#or the my expectations of you were low but what meme

[emchante]

softcore siren | m. verstappen

warnings: 18+/ suggestive — minors dni.

softcore porn streamer max has been in my mind all day for some reason, so i wanted to get this little thing out for me + @thef1diary seeing as she was so onboard with it too. definitely want to delve into this more!! drop into my inbox and hit me with your thoughts on this! <3

softcore porn streamer! max verstappen is a man you accidentally stumble across one day when scrolling through the ‘just chatting’ category. the thumbnail for the stream is a still image of max in a shirt that fits his chest snuggly, strong arms bulging slightly as he has his arms crossed at his front.

he’s an attractive man— you can’t deny that— so you decide fuck it, and click onto the stream.

as soon as the stream and chat loads, you’re hit with a mix of of thirsting messages in the side bar, and max’s low, accented voice as he spoke to everyone. he isn’t talking about anything specific, just chatting away and answering any questions he can see in the flurry of horny messages.

suddenly he lets out a warm laugh, and it’s unexpectedly charming. “alright, alright,” he rolls his eyes playfully, “i see your messages. i see what you’re here for, calm down. we’ll get to it,” he winks, leaning right to the camera momentarily as he shifts himself upwards to sit in a more comfortable position. the eye contact through the screen causes a breath to catch in your throat.

as max sits back he stretches right up, allowing his shirt to ride up and give the viewers a sliver of stomach. you couldn’t deny your eyes scanned the area the full time it was on screen, silently begging it to go even further. then, max moved his hands behind his head, allowing his arms to flex with his muscles bulging through the-short sleeved shirt. his softer chest area became more defined as the shirt tugged against it, until he allowed his arms to fall to his side.

he topped it all off with what could only be described as a soft moan, his eyes fluttered shut and his freckled lip curving into a smile.

your eyes drifted to his chat once more, watching the flood of messages be sent in as max teased his body, adding a moan at the end of his little show. some people were begging him to flex his arms again, for him to go shirtless, whereas others took a more meme-like approach. ‘do you need a bra for them?’, for example.

you wanted to join in on the fun, so you did. you didn’t say anything extreme, more-so joining the thirsty comments but keeping your own tame. a simple ‘god, you’re so fine?’, allowing it to get buried within the pile.

but it didn’t.

your eyes widened as your chat was highlighted with ‘first time chatter’, and fuck— since when was that a thing?

max seems to catch sight, raising a brow as he catches your comment and the fact you’re new. “oh? we have a new chatter, guys. welcome in,” he smiles, looking to the camera and winking. “appreciate the compliment.”

your breath caught in your throat at him reacting to your message and greeting you, that you didn’t even catch the amount of welcomes you got from his regulars. there were even a few ‘she’s so lucky??’ from others.

max grins before leaning back in his chair, his crossed arms resting over his front again. this time though he was pushed back a little more, allowing him to lift his foot onto his chair as he perched into a position where his thighs were in shot. and shit— you were not expecting that.

his grin only widened as the chat had another outburst about him, commenting about his thighs and what they wanted to do to them. though he was reading them, he had ignored them and went back to what the previous topic. “aww, no other message from newbie?” he fake pouted, before peering right into the camera lens once more. “don’t worry though, everyone starts out shy, confused. you’ll figure out soon enough why you’re here.”

and the thing is— he’s right. you do find out why you’re here.

you stay on the stream much longer than you had intended to, watxhing as he balances humour, flirtation, and just the right amount of teasing and mischief. you realise his fans aren’t just obsessed with his looks— they’re drawn to the way he makes everyone feel seen, chats to them like he would any other person.

by the end of the stream, you’re still not entirely sure how you got sucked into max verstappen— the softcore porn streamer on twitch’s front page. but as you close the tab for the night, your cheeks are hot and there’s a lingering smile on your face.

one things for certain: this wouldn’t be the last time.

⋆˙⟡ enjoy this? i hope you did! please come chat to me about it in my ask box! publicly or on anon— i’ll answer everything <3

[alianoralacanta]

Just read the news about Matteo Bobbi and Davide Valsecchi getting suspended due to a sustained exchange of sexist comments in the Sky Italia post-Spanish Grand Prix chat. I am very disappointed in them and had thought that they’d know better. How, exactly, does one keep a broadcasting job for 10 years and still think it’s a good idea to continue exchanging such quips after being told off about them on air?!? That’s not simply a human decency issue, that’s a professional competence issue! Speaking of which, well done to Frederica Masolin (the other pundit on screen) for adroitly handling their combined folly. Her comment is the only one I will repeat here: She told the pair to ‘be careful’ but as the joke continued added: ‘Can we watch some interviews instead of these two? Let’s hear from Carlos Sainz, please. I’m going to censure you two.’

[f1goat]

not a chance + lando norris (one shot)

In which Lando thinks he's going to win a race, to which you tell him the chances of you two fucking are as low as him winning a race - so what happens when he wins?

lando norris x fem!sainz reader tw: smut + not proof read (as usual)

masterlist - playlist

“I think this is going to be my day,” Lando tells your brother, Carlos, with a confident tone in his voice. “Maybe I’ll actually win today.”

You can’t help yourself and let out a soft laugh. “As if,” you mutter softly. You don’t expect anyone to pay attention to you, let alone hear your comment, but while looking at Lando you’re quick to realize that he did hear you. He is sending you an annoyed glare, while Carlos tries to tell you without words that you should shut up. Bit too late for that now. 

“Don’t believe me babygirl?” Lando asks you. The earlier confidence in his voice has disappeared and made place for a sarcastic tone, one Lando only uses with you. “Nope,” you say, making sure that you’re popping the p. 

“I’m not doing this again,” Carlos sighs while looking at his little sister and one of his best friends. Lando and you both know what he’s talking about, but neither of you is backing away. Lando is even getting closer towards you. “I’ll see you later,” Carlos continues, “hopefully after the two of you finally fixed the fucking sexual tension between you two.” 

It’s not a secret that Lando and you don’t like each other. You don’t know how it happened, where you were once almost as close with him as Carlos, things changed between you two. Friendly conversations changed into sarcastic, mean remarks meant to hurt to other one. Meeting up when Carlos couldn’t join changed into only seeing each other when Carlos dragged the both of you in the same place. Always texting with each other, sending memes towards each other eventually changed into ignoring each other on every social platform. 

Whatever happened to cause the change between Lando and you, has never been clear to you. Sometimes you blame yourself for taking a bit more distance when Lando got his first girlfriend, but eventually it was Lando who really changed his attitude towards you. Sometimes you miss how it was before, or better said every time you see Lando you miss how it was before. Even if you were fighting your feelings for him, it was better then acting like you hate him. Of course you don’t hate Lando, how could you - especially after crushing on him for the longest time. 

Your phone vibrates in your hand, you look at the text that’s coming in. It’s from Carlos. When you’re done toying with Lando, I’m at Ferrari. Saved you a seat. You should go to him now, that would be the smart thing to do. But Lando is still standing closely in front of you. Carlos believes that something else is going on between Lando and you, something that’s according to him caused by romantic feelings, but according to you that’s bullshit. Your crush on Lando doesn’t exist anymore, right? 

“Funny to see the girl who believed in you the most turn into one of your biggest haters,” Lando mutters annoyed. He truly feels betrayed by the way you’re talking about him and the upcoming race. He means his earlier words. Sometimes he wonders how things would be between you two if he did some things different. A lot changed when he was dating his ex girlfriend, changes he can’t undo but he wants to fix them. If you’ll let him.

“Not a hater,” you reply, “just a realist.” 

“Just watch me babygirl,” Lando says, “I’ll show you.”

“No thanks.”

“And after the podium I’ll find you and show you what else I can do,” Lando continues. He almost sounds dangerous. It causes you to feel flustered. What is he talking about? 

“The chances of you’re winning the race are as low as the chances of us going to fuck,” you tell him as if it’s a fact, while in reality you’re not so sure about yourself. 

“Seems like a good celebration, I’ll find you after the race,” Lando says, he has found his confidence back. 

“You’re crazy,” you sigh, “I’m not listening to this any longer.”

“See you after the race babygirl,” Lando says when you walk away from him.

“You won’t.” 

+++

Fuck. Did this actually happen? You don’t know whether to laugh or to cry when you’re looking at Lando who’s screaming from happiness while getting out of his car. How did he actually win todays race? What does this mean? What is going to happen now? Is Lando expecting that you’ll have sex with him now? Fuck. 

You see the way your brother is hugging with Lando, how happy he is for his friend. It makes you think about how you felt before. Every time Lando stood on the podium you’d beam with pride, you love(d) seeing him on the podium. It was you who always told Lando that he would be standing on the top step soon and that you’d be there to celebrate with him. How things changed. 

While looking at Lando who’s still celebrating with his team, you think back about the day things really went wrong between Lando and you. It has been months before it all crashed down, months filled up with weird tension and uncomfortable moments. Which all started when Lando got a girlfriend. You can’t blame him for that, you still don’t, but you just didn’t like her. Maybe it was because of your crush on Lando, maybe it was because his girlfriend sensed something and made sure that Lando and you couldn’t spend any time together anymore. 

“You don’t get it Lando,” you tell him, “I never get to see you anymore, you’re always busy and don’t make time for me anymore. What changed? Are you bored of me? Am I not fun enough to be your friend anymore?” 

“No, that’s not it,” Lando quickly says, “I just don’t have the time anymore.”

“You seem to have time for everyone expect for me,” you bitterly state, “I’m not stupid, I see how you’re traveling all around the world to meet up with every friend you have.”

“It’s different,” Lando defends himself. 

“Just tell me what I did wrong,” you sigh, “since you’re in a relationship everything changed between us.” 

Lando knew at that moment that he should tell you the truth. How he only agreed to his relationship so he could forget about his feelings for you, but he doesn’t dare to say so. And now he’s in a relationship with a weird influencer who seems to hate you and who doesn’t ‘allow’ him to see you anymore. He really should break up with her, but what will happen then?

“It’s just that she doesn’t like you,” Lando eventually tells you, “and as her boyfriend I need to chose her side, I guess?”

“So that’s it? Your girlfriend, from two months, doesn’t like me so you just decided to stop spending time with me, your friend from multiple years?” You ask confused. This time you don’t wait for Lando to continue. “That’s just, fuck, I don’t know what to say to that. Good to know my worth,” you continue sadly. 

After his confession which still wasn’t the whole story, Lando didn’t know what to say anymore. He watched how you left, but didn’t follow you to make things right. Maybe it’s for the better for now. There’s nothing he can do for now. He has a girlfriend, he needs to forget about his feelings for you and move on. 

Two hours later he broke up with his girlfriend, but then he was already blocked by you. 

After Lando celebrated with his team, almost all the other drivers and everyone else who congratulated him, you’re waiting for him to get on the podium. You feel weird while watching Lando on the podium. There’s a part of you who’s incredibly proud of him, a part that wants nothing more then to run over to Lando and hug him and tell him how proud you are of him. The other side of you is only thinking about what will happen next. 

When Lando is standing on the podium, you can’t stop thinking about how hot he looks. When Carlos finds his place next to you and watches Lando with you, he notices the way you keep looking at his best friend. “I really wouldn’t be mad if there would happen something between Lando and you,” Carlos tells you for the millionth time. “You’re crazy,” you reply annoyed. 

What Carlos and you both don’t notice is the way Lando is looking for you from the podium. When you look up again, you lock eyes with Lando. He sends you a wink. Fuck. 

After the podium you walk away together with Carlos, you want nothing more then get back to the hotel and sleep. This day was confusing and long, you can’t wait for it to end. Lando notices you walking away, without thinking about it he walks away from the press and starts to get towards you. He hurries and almost runs towards you. When he finally reaches you, he grabs your arm. 

“What the fuck,” you mutter when you feel someone grabbing your arm. Surprised you stop walking and look behind you. You don’t even know if you are surprised or not when you notice that it’s Lando. 

“You’re coming with me,” Lando tells you with a stern voice. Carlos looks confused at the two of you. You can only sigh. What are you going to say to this? You really don’t know. Slowly you nod at Lando, confusing your brother only more. Lando is quick to say a goodbye to Carlos and starts to walk off with you. 

+++

Lando dropped you in his drivers room. He still has media duties, but he wanted to make sure that you didn’t leave in the mean time. While giving interviews and talking with everyone, his mind is focused on you. He can only hope that you’re still waiting for him. 

In the mean time you keep thinking about what to do. You’re stressed out because of everything that’s happening. What will happen when Lando comes back from his interviews? Are the two of you going to talk things out and finally make it right? Or are you going to fight? Or is Lando actually for real and does he wants to fuck you? 

Eventually the stress makes you crazy. You decide to call your brother. Who knows for how long Lando is busy, you really need to talk with someone about this and who’s better then one of Lando his best friends? You know that your brother knows about your earlier feelings for Lando, so you can only hope that he will help you now. What if your feelings return? Or better said, what if you finally realize that they have never left?

“Carlos you really need to help me,” you start to speak when Carlos picks up.

“No, no, you need to tell me what’s going on between Lando and you! He left an interview to pick you up and now he’s doing interviews again? Where are you?” Carlos reacts.

“I’m in his drivers room,” you confess, “but I don’t know what will happen between us.” After that you explain to your brother what happened earlier today when he left Lando and you alone. Carlos chuckles when you tell him about Lando his bold replies. 

“What do you want to happen?” Carlos asks you eventually.

“I don’t know,” you say honestly. 

“You do know,” Carlos replies, “you’re just not honest to yourself. But we both know that you’re still in love with Lando.”

Before you can react to those words, Lando is entering his drivers room. You can only pray that he didn’t hear anything from what Carlos just said. “Lando’s here,” you tell Carlos on the phone, “I’ll talk to you later.” Before hanging up you hear Carlos say something childish in the lines of ‘doing it safe’. As if Lando wants something like that to happen you think annoyed.

“What am I doing here Lando?” You ask. 

“I’m getting my reward,” Lando tells you with a small smirk on his face. 

“Your reward?” You ask confused. 

“The chances of you winning the race are as low as the chances of us having sex,” Lando speaks up, “Remember those words babygirl?” 

“What do you want Lando?” You ask him. 

“You.”

Lando his answer makes you shiver. His following movements make it only worse. Without giving it a second thought, Lando pulls you into himself. His finger is under your chin, softly lifting it up for himself. He looks you into your eyes, searching for some sort of approval before he continues with his movements. When you show him a quick nod, he’s sure about it. Lando presses his lips against yours. 

Fuck, you can’t remember the last time a kiss felt so good. Now that you think of it, a kiss probably never felt this good before. It feels like everything is finally falling into it’s place. Lando pulls you as close into himself as he can manage. Your lips don’t leave his. When you feel Lando his hands on your body, a soft moan leaves your lips. Lando feels it vibrate against his own. Slowly he pulls back from you. 

“Lan,” you softly whimper when he doesn’t stop looking at you. 

“What is it babygirl?” He asks you. It’s the first time in a year that the nickname feels sweet instead of sarcastic. 

“Do something please,” you beg. 

Lando is quick to respond to your pleas. His hands find your body. Slowly he explores your curves while he presses some soft kisses on your neck, shoulders and face in the mean time. When Lando his hands are getting lower, you’re quick to lift up your skirt for him. Lando smirks when he notices it. 

“What do you want me to do?” Lando asks you. 

“If you can win,” you softly say, “then you also can fuck me I guess.”

This time Lando doesn’t hide his excitement anymore. He shows you an enthusiastic grin and moves away from you. Before you can complain, he’s already sitting in front of you. He takes off your skirt and starts to trace figures onto your still clothed cunt. He feels how your string is already damp. 

“You guess?” Lando asks you. 

“Don’t tease,” you tell him, “just fuck me already.”

Lando removes your string from your body. He moves his head closely to your cunt and presses a soft kiss against your clit. He’s in conflict with himself, he wants to take his time with you and show you exactly what he has to offer but he also just wants to fuck you right now until the both of you are lost for words. 

“Lan,” you whimper.

“Can’t I take my time with you babygirl?” Lando asks you teasingly. In the mean time he pulls down his race suit and boxers. 

“Next time,” you reply.

It makes Lando’s heart miss a beat. You’re thinking about a next time? His smile gets bigger again. He pulls you closer to him and aligns his dick with your entrance. You grab his hair in the mean time and try to get Lando closer towards yourself so you can kiss him again. When Lando lets his dick enter your body, it causes you to let out a loud moan. 

“Fuck,” Lando groans, “waited fucking four years to feel this.”

You barely hear him. Lando his words surprise you. Four years ago the two of you just met. At that time Carlos just got Lando as his new teammate. What does Lando mean with this. Before you can make things more clear for yourself, Lando continues to speak.

“Always wanted to fuck you,” Lando grunts, “Always thought about fucking you.”

Does this mean what you think it means? 

“What about..” You start to ask. “Don’t say her name,” Lando is quick to interrupt you. How does he already know that you’re talking about his ex? “Only got with her so I could forget you,” he confesses. 

“Fuck,” you moan, you don’t know but after Lando his sudden confession the sex feels even ten times better then before. “Always wanted you to fuck me as well,” you confess. 

That makes Lando slow down. 

“Waited four years for you,” you continue to confess.

This time Lando stops moving inside of you. 

“Are you serious babygirl?” Lando asks confused. 

“Yes,” you softly tell Lando, “I’ve had a crush on you for the longest time.”

Lando grins, “That’s good,” he says, “Really good.” He picks up his earlier pace and continues to fuck you. When the both of you reached your high, Lando carefully pulls back. He pulls you onto himself. Holding you as close towards himself as he can. 

“Four years right?” You ask Lando. 

“Four years,” he replies with a nod. 

The both of you let out a soft laugh. Suddenly nobody cares about what happened between you two in the last year. Sure, you will talk about it some time. But not now. Lando presses a kiss against your cheek. 

“Did you really think I couldn’t get a win today?” Lando suddenly asks you. 

“Lan,” you softly say, “I always believed you could get a win everywhere.” 

“That’s a girlfriend thing to say,” Lando jokes, “Are you my girlfriend now?”

“Do you want me to be?” 

“There’s nothing more I want to,” Lando confesses.

“Then I guess I’m your girlfriend,” you laugh. Lando kisses you again. 

“Let’s grab dinner with your brother,” Lando suggests, “and after that I want you in my hotel room so I can take my time with you.” 

“Deal.”

y/n: want to get dinner with me and my boyfriend?

y/n: he’s a race winner ;)

carlos: finally

[inkpot909]

How They Text the Reader Headcanons #2

↳ Characters included are Giorno Giovanna, Pannacotta Fugo, and Narancia Ghirga. Gender neutral Reader; implied everyone lives AU.

A/n: Thank you all so much for the support on my last text headcanon list. It was so fun to write, and I hope that y'all enjoy the second-half of the main part five cast. Once again, I had a blast while writing this!

Warning(s): None.

Giorno Giovanna

You expected him to be a dry-texter, in all honesty. Straightforward and to the point; only ever texting out of necessity. You couldn’t really imagine him as the type to sit down, and have a silly conversation over text.

And at the beginning, that was certainly the case.

Being introduced to the team all at once is certainly overwhelming, and although Giorno adjusted well, he still didn’t know you or the others.

Within the team’s groupchat, he only ever spoke up about important matters as that were being discussed. Whenever a more lighthearted conversation arose, usually because of Mista, he would grow completely radio silent.

Does he really read those texts at all? you recall yourself wondering, Or does he tune us out completely? Can’t really blame him if that's the case; this team... takes time to adjust to.

And eventually learning that he always read those conversations, it was one of the first indications you saw of his character. One of the first times you realized he can and will find his place on the team.

So, while you were in the process of just getting to know Giorno, you developed low expectations when it came to communicating with him over the phone. Hell, you hardly expected him to text you at all.

Oh, what a fool you once were.

As the relationship blossoms, Giorno still texts you as usual. With proper grammar and punctuation, as well as the occasional emoji or two.

But he's far from being a dry-texter. On the contrary, he’s rather cheeky.

And because of his position in Passione after a certain point, work soaks up a lot of his time. He’d much rather call you, but that’s simply not an option most days.

So he simply pokes and teases you over text. Sitting alone in his office, he almost always wears a tiny yet pleasant smile on his face when he reads whatever you send him.

Giorno doesn’t send memes or funny pictures often, but when he does, it’s either pure gold or ridiculously unfunny. Merely doing it every now and then to get a little bit of a rise out of you, of all things.

And he loves it even more if you’re the type to tease him right back:

Pannacotta Fugo

Practically the inventor of double-texting.

He’s got no shame in it either, and if anything, he would argue that him sending multiple messages means you ought to reply. He’s not exactly impatient with you, though.

He usually uses proper grammar over text as well. More than that, he’ll lecture anyone case for not doing the same. He even once pointed out a simple mistake Abbacchio made.

It’s merely lighthearted teasing if you’re the type to not use proper grammar over text, though. Fugo wears his favoritism for you on his sleeve whenever he gets on Narancia’s case for the same exact reason.

That said, when he’s angry, forget about grammar- you just want to be able to understand him.

He complains to you over text... a lot. The outlet is good for him, in a sense. Fugo’s incredibly grateful to have someone like you who will listen to him so earnestly, and he expresses that often. Considering his temper, it really does mean so much more to him than he knows how to express.

It makes knowing whether or not he’s genuinely upset or just playing around easy for you to figure out, at least. Are his text messages legible? If so, there's no reason for concern.

Once, he was ranting to you about a disagreement that arose between him and Abbacchio. His texts were steadily becoming hard to understand, and you prepared yourself to talk to your boyfriend through his anger.

But before you could, he stopped texting you all together.

That was rather confusing, as he’s the type to continue blowing up your phone when frustrated. It wasn’t until almost twenty minutes later, when you saw Mista’s contact pop up for a phone a call, that you found out why.

It was Fugo on the other end, calling from Mista’s phone to bashfully inform you he chucked his own phone out of anger and ended up breaking it.

Later that year, you got him one of those expensive cases that could likely protect a phone falling from absurd heights for Fugo’s birthday. He seemed a bit embarrassed over it, but appreciated the gift nonetheless (He won’t admit it but it does come in handy).

You just cannot stop yourself from teasing him a little bit, especially over the phone. His indulgent reactions are worth it every single time:

Narancia Ghirga

He’s bound to make you cry from laughter over text. Whether it’s his words alone or a meme he sends you from his vast collection (His phone is almost always on the brink of running out of storage), making you laugh comes naturally to him.

It’s a source of pride for him, so reacting bombastically over text is exactly what he’s looking for.

Narancia is also a major sucker for gossip, so he loves sharing everything he hears with you over text. From a random conversation he eavesdropped overhead while out, to drama taking place within Bucciarati’s group.

Doing the same in return is greatly appreciated, as he adores hearing your input.

He’ll also text you at random asking questions like “What did Buccarati want me to do again?” and “Do you happen to know where I put my notebook?” Whenever he racks his brain and cannot find an answer to a dilemma, he’s almost always going to voice his confusion to you with little hesitation.

He’s sent you those types of texts... while on missions. Snitching to Bucciarati is not advised.

You’ve tried telling him he could type those sorts of things down in his notes, but he either forgets to do so or wrongfully assumes that he’ll remember.

Narancia, Mista, Fugo, and you have a groupchat separate from the others on the team. Considering the madness that regularly occurs on it, Narancia’s proud to mention he’s the one who originally suggested the idea.

That said, as much as he likes to text you, he’s not the type to text you good morning and good night every day. Rather, he texts you only when “he has something to say.” Which... is often enough on its own.

He will also complain to you over text often as well. Although, it's not usually out of outright anger:

[the-dreadful-bard]

As suggested by an anon, I wrote a oneshot based on one of my rejanis text memes. Here it is. No title because I'd rather die than pick titles for fics. Lmk what you think if you read it <3

Warnings: light sub/dom dynamics if you look too closely????, pretty obvious praise kink, Regina has bad thoughts, all that and there's not even smut in this??? Pairing: Regina/Janis Based on this:

Janis drives at the speed limit, her heart pounding against her ears as her thoughts run rampant. Did Regina really mean what she said? She needs to take the chance, there's no way she's losing an opportunity like that. If she's being messed with, she'll get mad at herself (and at Regina) later, not now. Now, it's time to take the leap. 

Her blood is rushing and she feels apprehensive about what she's about to do. She parks her car in Regina's driveway and has to will her heart to stop running, but she fails pathetically. She checks her reflection, making sure she looks acceptable, before getting out of the car and sending another text to Regina, even though her hands are shaking so hard she can barely hold her phone right.

Janis anxiously makes her way to the door of the large George household, waiting for Regina's response. She doesn't get anything back for a while. She waits a bit, shifting her stance every few seconds, and when she's ready to turn around and leave, the door opens, revealing a surprised-looking Regina George, who can't stop the nervous laugh that comes out of her lips as soon as she sees Janis standing there. 

“You actually came,” Regina says, with disbelief in her voice.

Janis scratches the back of her neck, face flushing as she takes in the sight in front of her. Regina is wearing pajamas. She clearly didn't expect visitors. Was she bluffing?

“Oh. I did. Should I go and pretend this never happened?” She asks, gesturing back to the car parked a few feet away. Her heart still won't stop pounding like crazy.

“No! I just thought you were playing around.” 

Regina's voice sounds softer than usual, which makes Janis even more nervous. She's so… 

“And I thought you might be messing with me,” Janis interjects.

Regina shakes her head and steps closer to her guest, who shivers. 

“I don't do that anymore. Not with you. I'm trying to be better, you know. To be honest about… how I feel. I was flirting. For real. I didn't know if you would believe me but a part of me really hoped you would.”

Again, Regina's voice makes Janis' whole body quiver. She looks up into those deep blue eyes that show vulnerability for the first time in what feels like forever. She didn't think she'd ever see that Regina again. Not even after they made up and stopped “hating” each other. It's thrilling. 

Janis finds herself filled with confidence. Regina was flirting with her. But did she mean what she said? Janis smiles shyly, trying not to lose her nerve.

“Well, am I getting the kiss you promised or nah?” She manages to ask, feeling proud of herself for not stuttering or choking on her words.

A smile takes over Regina's lips and she plays with her hair for a moment while taking a quick look around before touching Janis' cheek and pressing a quick kiss to her lips.

It's over before Janis' brain can even register the fact that she's being kissed, and Regina stares back at her with a tiny grin. Janis tilts her head and pouts. 

“That was way too quick, I could barely even feel it!” She complains.

Regina chuckles, running her fingers through her hair.

“Fair. Come in, I don't want my creepy neighbors watching us.” She says, grabbing Janis by the hand and pulling her until they're standing inside the house. 

Regina slams the door behind them and pushes Janis' back against it, grinning as she stands dangerously close to her and raises an eyebrow as if challenging her to make the move this time.

Janis gets on her tiptoes and wraps her arms around Regina's neck before kissing her with obvious desire. The blonde lets out a low moan when Janis pulls on her hair.

“Oh, you like that, don't you?” Janis teases.

“Shut up.” Regina protests, face flushing in a way that's actually adorable.

“Make me.”

That's all she needs to hear before kissing Janis again. 

They kiss for what feels like hours, discovering numerous new ways to make the other blush, until they separate with heavy breaths and ridiculously dilated pupils. Janis' legs feel like jello, and Regina's heart won't slow down.

“So… about that other thing you said earlier…” Janis says, holding onto Regina by the waist and looking up into her eyes adoringly.

“Oh, that. You think you're being a good girl?” The blonde inquires, smirking.

How she loves having Janis in the palm of her hand like this... It feels inebriating. She can't believe it took her so long to realize what her fucking problem was. If only she knew that before wasting so much of her time with mediocre guys. 

Janis rolls her eyes and gives her a pointed look. “You think I'm not? What else do I possibly need to do? Kneel? Do you want me to beg for you? Because that's a little mean, don't you think? Especially coming from someone who's already humiliated me plenty.” 

That makes Regina reconsider her strategy. Maybe Janis is right. Maybe, after all she's done… she should be the one begging.

She sighs, straightening her back. “You know what? You make a great fucking point. Let's change things up, kay?” 

With that, while keeping direct eye contact with Janis, Regina kneels down at her feet.

“Better?” 

She takes one of Janis' hands and kisses it, then positions it on the back of her head, wrapping her fingers around her blonde locks.

Janis struggles not to completely lose her shit at the image she sees. Regina George, on her knees for her, looking up at her with those blue eyes, her lips slightly open. It's truly a sight to behold.

“Do you like me like this, Jay? What d'you wanna do to me? I'm at your mercy, come on. Take me, boss me around, shut me up. Do what you've always wanted to do to me.”

That voice. Janis feels like she's on top of the world. She can't believe Regina would just give her so much power. With her other hand, she touches the blonde's cheek gently.

“Is this what you want?”

She would never put Regina in this position without her consent. She still feels bad about her revenge and how the girl died for fifteen seconds right in front of her not even a full year ago.

“I want you to want me,” Regina whispers, so soft she can barely hear it.

Janis sighs, rubbing her thumb over the soft skin under her touch.

“I do. More than I should,” she confesses.

“Then take me. Show me what I've been missing. Show me how to atone for what I've done to you. Punish me.”

Regina's entire body is in flames. She needs Janis. She can't handle it anymore. She's always wanted her. She doesn't know how to stop thinking about her eyes and her lips and the way her nose scrunches. She can't stop thinking about having Janis all to herself.

“You've been punished enough. What if I reward you instead? After all, you're a really good girl now, aren't you?” Janis asks, smirking as she finally finds the right thing to say. 

Regina's pupils dilate even wider as she takes in Janis' words. She nods, still staring into big brown eyes eagerly.

“I want to hear you say it. Tell me what you are.”

Regina tries to will the words out of her mouth, but there's something stopping her. She doesn't believe she's good. Not even now. She still feels like she's rotten to the core and undeserving of love. Undeserving of Janis.

“I- I don't know if I can.” 

Her voice breaks. 

Damn. That little voice in her head speaks up like it always does whenever she feels inappropriate. She tries to ignore it, but it knows her too well, it is her. It knows just how to affect her.

Congrats, Regina! You can't even do the most basic shit, like saying four words to please the girl you like. How pathetic. How long will it take for her patience to run out and for her to give up on you? After all, you gave up on her first, didn't you? You ruined her just like you ruin everything you touch. You'll never amount to anything. You'll always be a sad little rich girl with nobody to play with.

The look in Regina's eyes makes Janis' heart break. She has a fair idea about what must be going through the girl's head. Regina's always been easy to read when she wasn't pretending. Her eyes hide deep emotional turmoil from those who don't know her like the back of their hands. Like Janis knows her. She shakes her hand and crouches down so she's close to Regina's ear. 

“I know you can.” 

She presses a kiss on her cheek. 

“You're such a good girl, Gina. Being honest and open and offering me so much... that's a lot more than the old Regina would ever give me.” 

She leaves a kiss on the girl's forehead. 

“But it's okay. You don't have to say it. Not today. I'll make you say it eventually, though. I'll get you to believe it if you let me.” 

Janis lifts Regina's face and kisses her before straightening herself again.

“Get up.”

The blonde looks up at her with something that seems like sadness and confusion in her eyes. Janis doesn't want her anymore, does she? Because Regina failed. And of course, she'd fail, she can't ever do anything right.

“But-”

Janis shakes her head and holds Regina's face again.

“It was incredibly sexy to see you like this, but I think we should go to your room.” 

Those words ignite the hope inside her again and muffle down the noise in her head.

Janis helps Regina up and pulls her by the hand. She still remembers how to get to the girl's bedroom. Regina lets herself be guided, in silence as she still tries to come to terms with the fact that Janis might still want her. 

As soon as they get to the bedroom, Regina stares at the other girl with a question in her eyes, suddenly shy and nervous, which is a sight that Janis finds herself weirdly enjoying.

“What is it, Gina?” She asks, embracing the girl in front of her around the neck in a way she hopes seems casual. She's not sure she's ready for her to know just how much she actually cares.

“Are we still…” She trails off, avoiding Janis' eyes. She might seem like the most confident bitch alive, but Janis has always been her weakness.

“That depends on you, princess. I'm down for whatever you want to do. But we can also take a rain check and cuddle in bed for tonight, maybe make out for a while, I might let you get to second base if you behave. You know… take our time. But I mean, that's assuming you're not looking for a one-night stand, which-”

“I'm not! I want to see where this goes.” Regina interjects, unwilling to let Janis think even for a second that this is a one-time thing for her. 

Janis smiles softly, then gets on her tiptoes to kiss Regina with no rush. “Do you like me?”

That makes the blonde frown, confused. She thought it was obvious by now. How can't she tell?

“Uh, I'm starting to question your intelligence. Do you really need to ask? Of course I fucking like you, Janis. I got on my knees for you.”

Janis chuckles, enjoying being so close to Regina after having convinced herself she would never get this. 

“I wanted to hear you say it out loud. I mean, you already figured me out, you know I've been trying to suppress my feelings for you by giving you a hard time. No use denying it now.” She admits, smiling shyly at Regina, who squeezes her around the waist and leans down to kiss her soundly.

“That's good to know. Can you stay the night? We haven't shared a bed in forever. I, uh, I guess I missed you. And maybe you're right, maybe we should really savor this before going all the way. I mean, that would be different from what I usually do, which could be... I don't know, nice? Don't get me wrong, I'm-”

"Hey. It's okay. I know what you mean."

For some reason, hearing Regina say all that makes Janis feel more confident about whatever they're doing. It gives her the impression that she might be serious about this.

Janis grins, “And of course I can stay. Do you have some clothes I can borrow? I don't really feel like sleeping in jeans.”

Regina nods before letting go of Janis and walking away, only to return a moment later with sweatpants and a cozy-looking shirt. She hands them to Janis.

“Should I get changed here or...”

“I'll turn around.” She says, doing as promised, except... there's a mirror right there, which she obviously knew about. She winks at Janis through the reflection, and the girl, smirking, turns around, taking her shirt off and exposing her back to Regina, who can't take her eyes off the mirror. 

Soon enough, Janis is wearing Regina's clothes, which brings her back to years in the past before everything changed between them. It's bittersweet. But she likes where they are now. She just hates that it took them hurting each other so much before they could get there.

Regina gets under the covers and gestures for Janis to join her, which she does. She snuggles into her and presses her head against her chest, the thrumming of her heart bringing her peace. Janis gently runs her fingers through Regina's long blonde hair. 

“This is really nice,” Regina whispers, a few seconds later, eyes closed, truly enjoying their closeness and the way Janis touches her.

She hums in agreement, not stopping her gentle caresses on Regina's scalp. 

“Do you have any plans for tomorrow?” The blonde speaks up again, incredibly relaxed. Only Janis could get her to slow down this way. She's missed everything about this. About her.

“Not really. Why?”

“Let me take you out. On a date.” 

Regina can feel it as Janis' heart speeds up. She smiles to herself. 

“Oh! Really?” Janis asks, genuinely surprised. She didn't expect Regina to be so direct so fast, she thought for sure she would be the one having to make those moves. She's not displeased, though. As a matter of fact, she's excited. Giddy, one could say.

“Yeah, really. I told you I wanna see where this goes. I've never gone on a date with a girl before and I'm used to not putting in any effort with guys. They're easy, but boring. You… you're worth the effort.” 

Janis leans down to kiss Regina on the forehead, unable to stop herself from showing her affection. It feels so unbelievably nice to be with her like this.

“My answer is yes. But can I ask... When did you find out about how you feel?”

“About you?” Regina inquires.

Janis nods, making a little humming noise like she's saying yes. Regina fully knows the answer to her question, she's just unsure how the girl will react to that information.

“You're not gonna believe me.”

“Try me, I might.”

Regina sighs, resigning herself to her fate. She won't lie to Janis. It would be a terrible way to start a potential relationship.

“At first, I got really jealous when I saw you with Cady in the cafeteria. I wanted to take her from you. And then I wanted to take Aaron from her. Because if I couldn't be happy, nobody could. And I wasn't happy, no matter who I dated or what I did. I had no idea why- thought I was just not meant for happiness or love.”

Janis stays in silence, intently listening to Regina's confession. She had theorized that the blonde had a crush on Cady in the past. She never thought she was the one Regina might have wanted.

“I ignored it. Ignored how I felt when you and I kissed, ignored how I felt whenever I saw you since we stopped being friends—I couldn't think about you, it was dangerous in my head. Then I died.”

Janis' grip on Regina gets tighter then. She hates remembering that. The sight of her former childhood friend lying on the ground, bloody and broken. Not breathing. It still haunts her in her dreams sometimes. 

“You know, you were actually the last thing I remember seeing before I lost consciousness. And it felt like ages went by, and all I could think about was how I was going to die right there, with you hating me.”

Regina stops for a second, absorbing the heaviness of her own words. She's still not completely sure what happened that day. She doesn't remember much about the accident. Janis' arms feel even tighter around her, grounding her. That's what inner peace must feel like, she wonders. Being in the arms of someone you love, knowing they love you back. Maybe someday she might have that. This is the closest she's ever felt to it.

“When I woke up, it was like my brain was knocked into place, I guess. Everything felt different. I dreamed about you when I was in my coma, which is insane.”

That surprises Janis. The idea of Regina dreaming about her while she was fighting for her life is so… it is insane. She never would have guessed it.

“I dreamed that we were talking in the restroom during spring fling and I came out to you. I dreamed that you visited me almost every day while I was recovering. Those all felt like different realities, in a sense. It would never happen for real. It didn't happen, but this... this feels pretty close to those dreams.”

She sighs before continuing. “I think… the accident knocked out the part of me that was able to compartmentalize what I felt about you. Because when I woke up, I couldn't stop thinking about you. About what I did to you, and what you did to me, and how I needed to fix things. And when we did talk, when we agreed to forgive each other and see where that would take us, I found myself wanting to be around you more and more.”

Regina trails off for a second and lifts her head to watch Janis, who looks back at her silently and nods as if to encourage her to keep going.

“I don't know exactly when I started liking you. I can't fucking tell. Maybe I've felt this way forever and never knew on a conscious level. But I thought I would never get you the way I wanted you, I mean, I thought you still hated me until an hour ago.”

Janis gasps. “You did?”

That makes Regina chuckle amusedly and roll her eyes.

“Can you blame me? I was trying to send you a cute text earlier and you told me to shut the fuck up.”

Janis sighs, admitting to herself that Regina's perception makes a lot of sense. Sometimes she acts before she thinks. Maybe that's something she should work on.

“I don't know why I say the things I say sometimes. Well, this time specifically, I didn't want to listen because I was scared my brain would catch up to the fact that I could never really get over you. But I was, uh, I was surprised by your response.”

Regina's expression turns into a shy smile. She gently leans closer to Janis' lips, giving her the chance to push her away if she wants to, but she doesn't, so she kisses her softly before speaking up again.

“Yeah, I was being hopeful, though I fully expected you to tell me to fuck off. But when you didn't… I had to try and see what I could get away with. When I saw your text saying you were at the door I was really fucking shocked.”

Janis holds both sides of Regina's face and pulls her in for another unrushed kiss. She still feels warm and her heart shows no sign of calming down. This feels surreal to her. She really is in Regina George’s bed, lazily making out with her, after an insane turn of events that likely would never happen if they weren't so efficient at matching each other's freak.

“Oh, I wouldn't wanna waste an opportunity like that, ‘you kidding me? I'm glad you weren't messing with me, that would have been really embarrassing.” Janis admits when they separate a minute or so later.

“And I'm glad you came,” Regina reveals, kissing Janis’ neck. “I really wanna kiss you for like eighteen hours nonstop but I'm really tired and my back is killing me, so can we do that tomorrow?”

Janis leisurely runs her fingers through Regina's hair. “Of course. Do you take anything for the pain?”

“Sometimes. But right now I'm too lazy and cold to get up and take it so we're just gonna hope I'll wake up feeling better.”

Janis won't accept that. Not while she's around. “No, ma'am. What do you need? I can get it for you.”

Regina's heart fills with affection at those words. Her boyfriends were never so considerate and kind to her, not even Aaron (which deep down, she knows is her own fault.) It's hard not to swoon at Janis' obvious care for her.

“That's… really fucking sweet of you. It's in the bathroom cabinet, you can't miss it. It's the only orange bottle in there.” 

Janis kisses Regina on the cheek before gently untangling herself from her grip to get up. “Okay, I'll be right back, princess.” 

The girl returns less than two minutes later, with the medicine bottle and a glass of water for Regina, who thanks her before swallowing one of the pills with the liquid and setting them on the bedside table when she's done. Janis climbs back under the covers and the blonde immediately snuggles into her again, kissing her jaw. 

“Now get some sleep, yeah? I'll be here when you wake up.” Janis whispers, gently squeezing Regina in her arms and getting comfortable.

“Promise?”

The blonde's voice sounds exhausted but adorable. Janis sighs relaxedly.

“Of course, I would never miss our first date.”

Right! They're going on a date tomorrow! Regina can't fucking wait. She hopes she can impress Janis by taking her on the world's best first date. She might need a plan. Fast. Luckily, Karen and Gretchen have been really good at stupidly romantic plans since they started dating a few months ago. She'll text them asking for tips as soon as she wakes up. 

“Good. See you in the morning?”

“You bet,” Janis says, pressing one last kiss on Regina's forehead and closing her eyes, allowing herself to drift off to sleep holding the girl she never thought she'd ever get.

Regina falls asleep feeling like the luckiest person alive. She won't waste this chance. She'll do everything in her power to make Janis feel just as lucky for as long as she can. 

[dragons-hoard-of-fandoms]

(Murder Drones Episode 8 spoilers!)

Space. The final frontier.

Poor robo-roaches always getting tossed around and killed.

They just left Braiden and Rebecca's corpses there??

Honestly the Teacher is such a mood, I can't believe I never realized it before.

Solvedcalculus reference???

Nori you can't say that this is a Christian Minecraft server.

It's amazing how they're able to make her still convey emotions when she's only got one eye.

YES HE SAVED HER BUT ALSO WOW THAT WAS FAST

Well she did tell you to "Die Mad" about it, so...

Kiss. Kiss! KISS! KISS!! KISS!!! KISS!!!! KISS!!!!!

New cute date idea: Skydiving from space and burning up in the atmosphere together <3

THEY ARE DATING THEY ARE CANONICALLY DATING!!!!!!!!!!

Why no kiss tho :(

Dang it, that was Thad's only good pipe.

V IS ALIVE AND SHE RODE IN ON A SENTINEL I THOUGHT WE WERE JUST JOKING ABOUT THAT

AND IT HAS A LITTLE COWBOY HAT

SHE WAS LIZZY'S SECRET FRIEND AND SHE DID THAT ONE MEME

No!! Bad dingo!!! We do not eat our friends!!!

IT'S DOING THE WALL-E FIRE EXTINGUISHER THING

So did J know the whole time or was she kept in the dark at first and only recently found out? Not entirely clear on that.

You really think it's not gonna dispose of you once all the universe is dead?

V SAID BITE ME

I was fully expecting her to chuck N into the core for a second there. But TBH I don't think continuing to destroy the planet is gonna fix it.

THEY'RE SO CRINGE IN A COOL WAY I LOVE THESE STUPID DORKS

THE CAPTIONS SAY SOLVER CONFIRMED THAT IS NOT CYN

"Okey."

STOP STOP STOP STOP STOP STOP STOP STOP

Y'know J thinks pretty highly of herself for someone who's literally never killed a single person on-screen in the entire time that this show has existed.

Huh, I guess those theories about Uzi not having a core icon were wrong.

You get a panic attack! You get a panic attack! EVERYBODY GETS A PANIC ATTACK!

Wait which part of this is the trap?

FREAKIN EXCUSE YOU DID YOU NOT HEAR WHAT I JUST TOLD NORI THIS IS A CHRISTIAN MINECRAFT SERVER THERE WILL BE NO SWEARING

Uzi is not beating the bisexual allegations.

SHE IS CANONICALLY CRINGE AND FREE

Nori I don't think most people call their daughters "babe."

"...'Kay."

Playing Nightcore during a final battle is the most anime thing ever.

And the J abuse continues.

*teleports behind you* Nothin personnel, kid.

Okay bye J, thanks for literally nothing.

SECRET HANDSHAKE N YOU'RE SUCH A DORK

o7

THEY'RE SO STUPID I LOVE THEM

YOU STOPPED TIME???

SHE LITERALLY ATE A BLACK HOLE???

😦

Thad is confirmed the coolest dude on Copper 9.

Sorry y'all, Khori divorce real.

Man Teacher don't wanna deal with none of this, same TBH.

Everybody gangsta til the cowboy robot dinosaurs start driving buses

THEY LOVE EACH OTHER SO MUCH!!!!!

Nah you're not damaged you're just autistic and edgy.

Polyclue shippers low-key getting fed tho.

HE'S BEING SUPPORTIVE AND TEACHER STILL DON'T WANNA DEAL WITH THIS

HE CALLED HER HIS GIRLFRIEND!!!!!!!!!!

My heart goes out to all the Doll fans, y'all got done dirty. 😔

He's learning how to draw anime!!! His art is getting so good!!!

He finally got to play rummy with the WDF!

They're gonna passionately make love on that bed later.

Wow what did Rachel ever do to you. Also who's Rachel.

THE NUZI-VIZZY DOUBLE DATE FEATURING DINGO AS THE FIFTH WHEEL

THAT'S THE REAL CYN YOU CAN'T CONVINCE ME THAT ISN'T THE REAL CYN FINALLY FREE OF THE SOLVER AND LIVING IN UZI'S TAIL UNTIL THEY CAN MAKE A NEW BODY FOR HER

IN YOUR FACE EVERYBODY WHO SAID LIAM DOESN'T LIKE HAPPY ENDINGS!!!!

[saltymongoose]

ohh my goodness. i've been waiting to send these until requests were open bc i wanted to hear ur thoughts.

might be a little silly, but consider: matching outfits. player gathers clothing materials!! and coordinates outfits one day on missions!!!! even makes props!!! hijinks ensue. idk if this had already been disscussed before, but thank you for your time and consideration, ily. you are so cool <<3333!!!!!!! everything you make is so scrumptious!!!!! <33

Omg, thank you, this is so nice of you!!! :D ❤❤❤❤ I love this art so much, you have no idea - the way you portray the boys here fits so well (as always lol). And the memes too omg!! I can't even put it into words to be honest with you, these are just excellent. I do feel slightly bad for that random grunt though, something tells me they'll be sleeping with one eye open after seeing that lmao.

(Also, thank you so much for the compliments too of course, you're far too kind. (˶⸃ ⴰ⸃˶)♡ I could say the same to you btw; your art is always just *chef's kiss* perfection.)

Anyhow, I've actually thought a bit about this scenario before, but this just inspired me, so I wrote some short hcs for you. Hope you like them! <3:

The Player Matches Outfits with Them ft. The Main 3 + 2BDamned

(TW: Yandere, Obsessive Behavior)

- [2BDAMNED] -

2BDamned knew that you had been working on a little project - one that you tried to keep as secret as possible. He was curious, but not enough to encroach on whatever boundary you set regarding it. All he knew from your rather lackadaisical explanation was that he'd be very surprised when he saw. And, well, he was.

The first conscious thought in 2BDamned's head is the question of how you've managed to make a mask that looks so similar to his without borrowing the original. It's really spot on; the seams are in the exact same place, and even if yours has to have been configured differently to fit your more human facial features, the silhouette is exactly the same.

(In the end, he concludes that you simply must've studied his appearance for a while to truly replicate his mask, which makes him feel almost giddy in a way he might've deemed embarrassing before meeting you. But now he's just overcome with happiness that you were obviously interested enough in him to do this.)

He openly praises your skill in sewing, knowing that grunt clothing is ordinarily much too large for you. And you'd notice how the fondness he holds for you seeps into the words, his gaze lingering on you in a way that left you feeling warm.

If you could see underneath his own mask, you'd be able to see the smile he was unable to bite back as well, and the flush that he'd try to will away otherwise. And while he is incredibly impressed (and happy) at what you've managed to put together, he will mention that you could also borrow his actual things once in a while, if you feel so inclined. He just happens to think one of his own jackets might suit you too.

(Of course, he doesn't miss the chance to lean real close to adjust your mask as he says this either, just to fluster you even more. You really have no idea how cute you are, especially looking like this.)

- [DEIMOS] -

A full minute of unintelligible sputtering leaves Deimos' lips the moment he sees your new outfit, and you laugh at the way his face goes bright red. When you said you had a surprise, this was one of the last things he expected.

Luckily for him, he's able to quickly gather his composure, and his excited ramblings turn into smooth flirts that'll leave you blushing instead of him. Expect all sorts of comments about how cute you looked dressed up like him, and praises about how you look even better in his fit than he does.

He insists on taking a ton of pictures together, and you can bet he keeps his favorite in his wallet. (It's one of your faces smushed together as you both grin at the camera, making a heart with your hands.)

He considers this a total power-couple thing; matching shirts are so low-effort compared to this, if anything it shows you perfect you are together. Although there is one thing he'd help you change from your original DIY version of his outfit - those sheet-metal dog tags you made can't compare to the real thing in his opinion, so why don't you just use one of his instead?

Also, don't think he won't take advantage of the fact that you both are the only ones with headsets. Even if yours isn't functioning (because let's be honest, finding one in working condition would be difficult), he'll fix it up quickly just so he can talk more directly to you during missions. And whenever else he wants to, to the irritation of the other three.

- [SANFORD] -

Sanford would consider his outfit to be fairly standard, but he recognized that you were emulating him the moment you slid the sunglasses on. And he couldn't stop the goofy smile from splitting his face when he realized it either, not even attempting to hide his amusement at what you've done.

(He only gets visibly happier when you 'threateningly' brandish your wire hook in his direction. You really put a lot of thought into this, didn't you?)

While Sanford has the amount of restraint in him to not openly brag about you doing this, he can't deny the rush of satisfaction he gets from seeing you in what is an unmistakable homage to him. If you look closely, you'll see him straighten up in pride whenever you come into view. (It's almost like preening, really. If he weren't so flushed, perhaps you'd think it to be more of an ego thing, but no.)

Although, he does show a little bit more concern about some aspects of your outfit. Like your boots, for example; he can't count the number of times he's gotten blisters while breaking in his own, so you should expect him to ask you if you need any plasters (or help bandaging yourself as well).

(If you decide to accept his offer, you'll find yourself questioning whether he ever officially trained as a medic before. He surely has the gentleness befitting of one, shown in how he carefully cleans your wounds and softly applies the ointment, his calloused fingers gently smoothing over the plasters on your Achilles heels afterward. Although you have the slightest suspicion that this tenderness from him is known only to you.)

Sanford will also make it part of his routine to pluck your glasses from your nose and clean them after he does his own. Afterward, he'll slowly lean in when he places them back on you to make sure he doesn't poke you in the eye. Neither of you mention that you could do it yourself, or that his decision to slide them back onto the bridge of your nose himself was highly unnecessary. Maybe he just does it to get a better look at the way you blink up at him and blush, or perhaps it's for some other reason, who's to say? Either way, you have no complaints.

- [HANK J. WIMBLETON] -

Your laughs are muffled under Hank's hands as he cups your face, tilting it up to look closely at you. His excitement at your new look is almost palpable; you can easily tell from how he's shaking and hurriedly looking over, his gaze never stopping on one spot for longer than a second. He just wants to take in everything about your new look, is all.

He'll almost insist on doing a mission with you wearing it, not only because the idea sounds fun to him (with his love of carnage and all), but also because it provides an excellent opportunity to rub in everyone else's faces that you chose to copy his outfit. Not theirs.

In a way, he also becomes just a tad more doting than usual. He busies himself with dusting you off, and adjusting your goggles and the lapels of your coat whenever another skirmish is finished. It's his way of checking you over and making sure your hard work wasn't damaged either.

(Plus, he'd hate it if this instance of you copying him was cut short because of some worthless grunts' attempts at harming you.)

You'll catch him sticking closer to you than usual too, and he does so for multiple reasons. First is that he just prefers to be near you whenever he can anyway (the warmth of your presence is one of his favorite things, and it gives ample opportunity to show off around you), but now there's also the fact that your outfit will freak out your enemies. As you can imagine, he enjoys that immensely, and what better way to improve this experience than to have his Player join him?

In a way, Hank also sees this as a sort of 'claim' you've put on yourself too. Wearing your significant other's clothing is kind of a thing with some grunts, and while he knows they aren't really his clothes, there's still some of that same sentiment there that makes him purr just a bit louder whenever he sees you in that new outfit of yours. It tells the world you're his in some way, even if not officially. So why wouldn't he be happy about that?

[blackjackkent]

Another answer for one of @astreamofstars 's prompts from this ask for this ask meme: Kiss Roulette.

"33. A kiss to a scar, birthmark, injury, or other marking - Lae'zel/character of your choice"

Some context-less Shadowzel from Act 3 after the House of Grief, bc I haven't fully figured out how to include them in Rakha's playthrough yet. XD This is my first attempt at writing this pairing; hopefully it scans well! :D

-----

“Do you wish me to call you Jenevelle?”

Shadowheart peers out from her tent at Lae’zel sitting by the fire. “Why would you ask that?” she snaps irritably.

It’s not a fair response, and she knows it as soon as the words are out of her mouth. To her credit, Lae’zel doesn’t flinch from the moment’s sharpness, but answers in kind. “A thing true across all planes, I find, istik, is that most prefer to be called by their names.”

“It’s not my name. My name is Shadowheart.”

“A simple ‘no’ would have sufficed.” Lae’zel looks over her shoulder to meet Shadowheart’s eyes. A slight pause. “I am not your enemy… Shadowheart.”

Shadowheart lets out a heavy breath and her head ducks. “No,” she says. “No, you aren’t.”

She should know better, really. They certainly began as enemies, but so much has changed. They have suffered so much together. They have stood side by side, watching their religions burn to cinders in front of them, and found each other amidst the ashes.

It was meaningless sex at first, half-desire and half-anger, driven by a need for some kind of nameless forgetful oblivion where they could forget that their worlds had fallen apart. Gradually, though, it has become more than that. She has been allowed to see gentleness in the gith, and Lae’zel has been allowed to see her vulnerability in turn - and both things have been hard-won knowledge indeed, secrets held between the two of them, shown to no one else. 

Zhak vo'n'ash duj, Lae’zel called her once in a moment of passion. She hasn’t explained what it means, but Shadowheart can guess the implications.

And here she is, lashing out yet again anyway, as if it were still their first few days on the road, when preemptive strikes felt like the only way to survive. Gods, she’s so scared. Gods… it hurts.

“I’m… sorry,” she mutters, hunching her shoulders - as if still in expectation of mocking after all these months. “That wasn’t fair.”

“Chk. You owe no apologies,” Lae’zel says - still curt but quieter. “I am no yank to be felled with a harsh word. And it is not the first I have had from you, nor will it be the last.” She turns back to the fire and prods carefully at the meat roasting there, turning it carefully. “Nor would I wish otherwise.”

Shadowheart finds herself mesmerized by watching the other woman's fingers, surprisingly dexterous in counterpoint to her battering-ram combat style. “Do you know your parents?” she asks abruptly. “Did you leave family behind, in Kliir?” 

“The yanki are raised together in creche.” With quick, efficient motions, Lae'zel pulls the meat from the fire and lays it out on a platter nearby. “A cadre of nestmates is our first and only family.” She frowns. “Still, I am not blind to what you have lost.”

Shadowheart nods silently. Lae'zel's experiences are so alien at times that it is hard to imagine the places where they overlap. But they are both alone in a world full of shadowy uncertainty. 

“You're all I have left, you know.” The words emerge in a sudden rush; she looks down at her hands, ashamed without knowing why. 

And then Lae'zel's hands close over hers, calloused and rough from a life of swordwork, but gentle in their touch on her skin. 

“I am not blind to that either,” she says, her voice low. “You will not be alone while I am here.” She considers for a moment before going on, “In creche we are taught ra'quith vlaak - the frail perish. To cover for another's weakness is to open your own flank.” Her eyes lift to meet Shadowheart's, intent and serious and sad. “Perhaps once I found wisdom in this, but no more. You shall find me guarding the scarred places in you, and you shall guard mine.”

Slowly, with scrupulous care, she lifts Shadowheart's hand and presses her lips over the heavy black scar, the last mark of Shar's torments, that lingers on her skin.

Blood rushes to Shadowheart's face. She feels acutely conscious of the fact that Lae'zel has never before showed her any gesture of warmth in view of the rest of the camp. And she can see the flicker of anxiety that goes through the gith's cat's-pupil eyes with the action. 

But Lae'zel has been afraid a long time. She has never let it drive her actions - never before and not now. 

And Shadowheart feels her own courage rise in answer to it. “Yes,” she agrees softly. “As long as you'll let me.”

“Chk,” Lae'zel mutters. “You speak as if you think such promises come with endings.”

Shadowheart doesn't answer for a long while. “I have suffered many broken ones,” she finally says softly. “But not from you.”

Lae'zel's eyes brighten, and she kisses Shadowheart again, this time cupping a palm to her cheek. Like all of their kisses, it is fierce and rough, commanding, unrelenting, but it carries certainty in it that Shadowheart desperately needs. “Nor shall you,” she murmurs. “Zhak vo'n'ash duj.”

[1863-project]

For the ask game: common fandom opinion that everyone is wrong about?

[ask meme]

8. common fandom opinion that everyone is wrong about

I...actually get frustrated with the infantilization and/or demonization of characters that could be read as autistic, because it happens so often and there's such a lack of self-awareness when people do it. If one person headcanons it, a bunch of other people pile on, and before you know it, your character is being treated like someone else entirely - and unfairly so.

Let's take the most obvious example and the reason I don't engage with fandom much:

I am so tired of what fandom at large has done to Emmet since 2010. He's been infantilized since day one, often being portrayed as needing Ingo to take care of him or otherwise be his brother's keeper. He's also been turned into a violent, 'unhinged' stereotype since day one. Neither of these things are new. They've been happening since the release of the games. Neither of them have any basis in his canon characterization - a competent railroad employee who's a goofball but simultaneously responsible and always puts safety first.

I was hoping people had moved past that the way they moved past Blankshipping (though some people still do this, too, EW), but it seems like they haven't. Emmet is still either a helpless child or a serial killer waiting to happen to so many of these people, and as someone who actually felt so validated and seen the first time she discovered Ingo and Emmet, it hurts so deeply.

In real life, I'm also infantilized. I turn 35 this year and have a Master’s degree and work a big grown-up adult archivist job and live outside my parents' house, but because I'm neurodivergent and short, I'm frequently assumed to be and am treated like a teenager way more often than you'd reasonably expect. It's incredibly frustrating to constantly be treated like an innocent child because you don't meet neurotypical benchmarks of adulthood the way they want you to or because of the way you carry yourself or enjoy things. But at the same time, people shy away from me because I'm "too intense" about the things I care about.

Sound familiar?

Fandom was, when I was a younger girl, a place where neurodivergent people (especially autistic and ADHD people) were safe from the real world not understanding, accommodating, and accepting us. We generally kept things on the down-low, since it was another thing we'd be bullied for if people knew, but for us, it was a safe space. Then people realized fandom could be commodified, and once capitalism got a hold on fandom and made it mainstream, all our bullies were suddenly in our little space again, and...well, you probably know the rest. (Yeah, they brought their ableism with them.)

I'm not saying old fandom didn't have its problems. It had a LOT of problems. But it was, altogether, a safer space for neurodivergent people to find community and themselves than it is now. Now it feels more about producing things and moving on to the next big thing to produce more "content" to keep engagement instead of an actual community of nerdy, passionate people getting excited about each other's fanworks and chatting about their favorite things together.

And that reflects in how people treat autistic and autistic-coded characters now. Emmet is one example of many - look at Papyrus, or Entrapta, or numerous others.

This trend really, really fucking hurts, and I cannot stand how willingly fandom spaces just go along with it without thinking critically about it.

[httpknjoon]

what a week! | the a-listers finale

plot | Get ready. This is the busiest, craziest, and most intriguing week ever in your fandom with you coming back to the Hollywood scene with a bang, causing more tweets, more memes, and maybe drama about you and Jin.

words | 4.8k (oh my god)

genres | humor/crack, fluff, angst, actors!au

pairing | actor!jin x famous!reader

note | usernames used in the fic are all fictional. (more note at the end) have fun reading!

main masterlist | drabble series

Hollywood Superstar YN to Make Comeback on Her Saturday Night Live Hosting Debut This December 2

‘From The Other Side’ actress and producer, YN will host NBC’s Emmy-winning live comedy show, Saturday Night Live for the first time this Saturday after her hiatus last year.

It was announced through social media today that the Oscar-nominated actress will make her hosting debut on the show this coming Saturday.

Along with YN, Indonesian singer-songwriter NIKI will also be having her SNL debut as the musical guest of the night.

It is worth mentioning that this will be YN's comeback in front of the cameras after taking an unexpected break in April 2022. She pulled out from projects with other big personalities from Hollywood such as Chris Evans and director, Wes Anderson. 

Fans were instantly delighted by the news and expressed their joy over Twitter, with YN’s name being listed on worldwide trends almost immediately after the announcement. 

@/YNUpdates: YN is set to make an appearance on The Tonight Show this coming Wednesday.

Not even an hour after the announcement of your appearance on the live television show, your appearance on Jimmy Fallon’s show was also reported. You also acknowledge your SNL gig by sharing the post on your Instagram Stories. To say your fans were excited was an understatement.

@/uronurownkid: OH YM GOD SHE’S BACK LIKE REALLY BACK

@/l0verynjin: and this is a live show!! We’ll be seeing her on skits again!

@/ynflowerkid: with NIKI as the musical guest???? my two worlds are coming together

Everyone– the fans and the press– truly hyped up the upcoming show, prompting even the general audience to be aware. Some critics shared that you might be able to bring high ratings for the show because of your large and active fanbase. Success was already expected for you and the show.

“Everyone, please welcome, YN!”

You enter through the big blue curtains, wearing a classy Gianni Versace Couture black long bell-sleeve dress from the 90s. You were looking like complete royalty with the matching diamond necklace and earrings you wore as you had your hair in a sleek low bun. The audience welcomed you with cheers and you cannot help but be surprised by everyone’s reaction.

“Oh, wow…” you mumbled, Turning your eyes from the audience to the host.

“Wow, right? That’s a lot of love.” Jimmy said, which you nodded at.

“Yeah, this is a little overwhelming… in a good way,” you said which made everyone laugh. Before you turned and waved to the viewers again, “Hi, everyone!”

They began cheering in response. You giggled with their enthusiasm. 

“This is what you get for suddenly taking a break last year!” Jimmy said, using a stern, sarcastic tone.

You chuckled with that, “This is actually great! Maybe I should take unexpected hiatus every once in a while–”

“No, no, no.” Jimmy cut you off, more worried, holding your hand that rests on his table. You two instantly laughed. “We missed you a lot!”

“So… you’ll be hosting Saturday Night Live for this week…” he began.

“Yes. Yes, I am.” you nod as you shifted in your seat.

“How was it? How does it feel?”

“Oh, it feels really awesome! I’ve been wanting to host for a long time now since I loved the show ever since I was little. And I was really nervous at first when I showed up there. But everyone has been pretty nice and so talented. Everyone works so fast.” you shared, making the viewers laugh. “I’m not kidding! I was with the cast and Lorne Michaels in his office. Then, they asked me if I have any sketch ideas. After I shared mine, everyone just started to pitch like a hundred sketches and I was just sitting there, watching everyone collaborate. It’s amazing to see.”

“Yeah, that’s how it goes in the show.” Jimmy agreed. “It’s the best crew up there. The writers, the cast, the makeup and hair crew.”

“They are all wonderful,” you added.

“Yes. And you are going to be fantastic this weekend. Knock ‘em dead in Studio 8H. We’ll be watching.” he clapped and the audience cheered. Your lips form into a smile as you felt relief growing in your chest. 

Jimmy continued as the applause lies low, “The last time you were here, we were talking about your then-upcoming film, From The Other Side. And now, you got nominations for it and even won a BAFTA’s Best Actress last February! Congratulation on that. You deserve it.”

Everyone clapped while you smiled, “Thank you.”

“And your director, Emerald Fennell, read your speech for you. In which you state that she made you make that speech hours before the ceremony?!”

“Ah, yes.” you chortled. “I wasn’t expecting to win that night. I mean, the lineup of other nominees for that category that night was really incredible. So I didn’t bother to write anything. But Em really pushed me to send something. She always believed in me and knew that I have a chance in winning that award. So I just texted her anything I could think of and said I love Brandon Fraser.”

The conclusion at the end made Jimmy and the audience laugh.

“I mean, who doesn’t?” the host backed you up. “Then, Academy Awards came by March and everyone was expecting you’ll show up. But during the red carpet event, you posted this…”

Jimmy showed a snapshot of you playing the piano. You grinned, “I did. I’ve been learning to play the piano since last year and I know my supporters are waiting for me. So I just showed them I’m at home so they won’t wait up.”

“That’s nice and you were really good with the piano.” Jimmy compliments. “But can we talk about your hiatus?”

You pause and nod. Now, this is the part Hailey gave you a heads-up on. You were aware that your unanticipated break will be talked about tonight. Your manager gave you a guide on how the show and host will discuss everything in order. 

Jimmy, on the flip side, was told earlier by his producers that he can ask about it. Admittedly, he was confused and worried if you knew that you were going to be interviewed about your break since everyone knows you have been private for the past couple of years. He doesn’t want to cause any discomfort to his guests. When he confirmed that you agreed with the topic of tonight’s interview, he agreed to discuss it with guide questions from his writers.

“Yeah, sure.”

The tension was rising in the room at the moment you replied. It was dead silent. But what made it lighter was when the production crew chose to play things off by setting the spotlight just on you two, making it seem like an interrogation scene. It made everyone laugh, even you and Jimmy.

“So… people were saying you took a break last year because of a lot of things.” the host spoke, emphasizing the word.

“Oh, yeah. I heard about it.” you raised an eyebrow. “How about let’s play a game of true or false with those headline rumors?”

The audience cheered with excitement. This is a rare time a big celebrity would debunk or confirm news about them personally.

“Okay, okay. Let's start with this one…” Jimmy reads, “True or false. YN, are you planning to retire from acting really soon?”

“False, Jimmy! I’m hosting SNL this week for goodness’ sake,” you answered dramatically. The host laughed.

“She’s hosting SNL this week, people!” he repeated, looking at the camera. “How about this one? YN, true or false, did you move away from the country and lived in South Korea for a year?”

You grinned, “Partially true.”

“Explain yourself, YN.”

“Okay, the only thing that was right in that rumor is that I did move.” you teased everyone. “And no, I am not telling where.”

“Understood. Okay, let’s move to another one… oooh, this is the most controversial yet.” Jimmy laughed as he looked at you. “True or false, you took an unexpected hiatus because you got into a bad heartbreak.”

The audience’s reaction was all ‘ooh’ in a curious and a little worried way. Like they just saw someone sprinkling salt on someone’s wound. You took your time before answering,

“False,” you replied, shaking your head. “Definitely untrue. I think everyone just knows it when I’m in a relationship.”

“No, I don’t think we do, YN.” Jimmy rebutted, making the viewers laugh as they relate too. With years of everyone romantically connecting you and Jin, they just cannot tell if you two are romantically together or not. The host continued, “But are you not really dating anyone right now?”

“Oh, I’m not. I’m not dating anyone right now…” your voice trailed off as you make a side eye at the audience. They showed their disapproval with that by playfully booing, and you giggled.

He copied your tone and action as he asked, “But is there anyone you’ve been seeing currently or…”

“I don’t know, Jimmy…” you sighed, shaking your head. You acted disappointed in a very obvious way.  “It’s really hard to find someone to date when you’re married. I mean, I think it’s a crime to go out with someone while–”

Big gasps. Everyone in the room– excluding you– gasped at the same time that it was audible. Their eyes were wide, a few have their hands on their chests, and someone screeched in surprise at what you said.

“Wait, what?” Jimmy asked as soon as he picked up what you just said.

“What?” you looked around the room, acting like you didn’t just say something of a big deal. “Oh, yeah. I’m married, you guys!”

Breaking the silence, the band played the drums as you showed off the wedding ring on your finger, hiding below the bell sleeve of your dress. Not just a wedding band, but a blinding engagement ring also sat on top of it. 

“Oh my god! Congratulations!” Jimmy stood up from his swivel chair and walked up to you. You stood up and you shared a hug. He whispered, “Congratulations!”

“This is wonderful!” he added, as he holds both of your arms.

You laughed as you nodded, “I know!”

Everyone laughed while applauding at the fact you are now married. Jimmy hugged you again before walking back to his spot. You can feel your cheeks hurt from how long you have been smiling throughout the interview. But you love it. You love that you finally shared the news with the public.

“When did you get married?” the host asked.

“Two years ago! It was in 2021, Jimmy!” you replied happily and you heard another series of reactions in surprise.

“What?!” Jimmy’s lips gaped. “You were already married when you went here last time?”

You nodded with chuckles, “Yes. My husband and I chose to be pretty private about the whole process. We value enjoying the first couple of years of our marriage without the whole attention of everyone. But now, we decided to share it with you, guys finally!”

“This is really great, YN. Thank you so much for coming to the show.” Jimmy smiled and you can feel that he was genuine. Jimmy turned to the camera again, “YN. Ladies and gentlemen! We’ll be right back.”

The camera still caught you waving to everyone before it cuts to the commercial. With this kind of news, it was expected how everyone will react. Showbiz websites and accounts began writing their articles. Your fans were expressing their emotions and surprise.

@/ynisthatgirl: the fuck you’re telling me yn been married since 2021

@/YNUpdates: Congratulations to our main girl and the lucky guy! 🥰🥰🥰

@/MIDNIGHTPAIN_: BIGGEST PLOT TWIST IN THE YN FANDOM

@/YNJINUpdates: 🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️

Replying to @/YNJINUpdates

- @/versaceisyn: what’s with the candles

– @/walkingonsunshine: i think we all know what’re the candles for

@/frannycatfood: but who is the husband though 👀

@/ynilysm: i just woke up…

Linked with you revealing your marital status is the identity of your husband. Everyone began taking their bets on who is your mystery spouse. Of course, topping the list is your three-time co-star and always rumored lover, JIN. One of the most memorable stories in the YNJIN fandom is when you two flew to South Korea with friends back in 2021.

@/outtahere: ur telling me ynjin prolly got married in seoul two years ago?

Then, the theory about you having a secret partner was brought up. Ever since the lockdowns, some people have believed that you are possibly dating someone who is not in Hollywood. They claimed that someone is a successful, private, and young entrepreneur.

It’s no secret that there are people and solo fans who think that you and Jin are only doing the whole ‘dating or not dating’ bit for attention and to keep your names floating on social media and articles. It helped you two become household names in Hollywood, other than your works. You two were everywhere online with your fans making edits, sharing their thoughts, and posting every picture of you. Although accidentally, the general public was always aware of what was going on with you.

And what’s going on with your always rumored lover, you might be wondering. 

Jin is still inactive on social media. His last online update was promoting the final episode of his limited series on HBO, which was a couple of months ago. But he had public appearances since the premiere. Two appearances to be specific.

Friday, almost two days after you announced your marriage and fans made their theories about your husband’s identity. Of course, the number of people who believed that Jin is your spouse was high. They were hoping to see Jin around New York since you will be doing SNL there for the weekend and they will take it as confirmation. But in lieu, he was seen walking out of a coffee shop in LA, where he was kinda hoarded by the press during the morning. He was alone as he tried to make his way to his car.

One of the camera guys cannot help but ask, “Did you know YN is married?”

“I did. She is one of my friends in the industry. Of course, I knew.” he answered simply, not bothering to look at the cameras. He just focused his eyes on the pathway to make sure he won’t stumble because of the press crowding around him.

“Any thoughts about it?” another one asked.

“I’m happy for her. She deserves happiness above all.”

His lips can be seen forming into a small smile as he replied. He finally got to the driver’s seat of his car. Before he hopped in, he answered one last question.

“Any hints about her husband?”

“Nice guy. A little childish sometimes but he makes good jokes.” he chuckled before driving away.

The video was uploaded by the paparazzi on the same day. Jin trended worldwide as fans expressed their thoughts about it.

@/1800JIN: i cannot believe how fast things are going rn this is crazy

@/badnonnie: NOW WHY WOULD HE SAY THAT ABOUT YN’S HUSBAND 💀

@/YNJINUpdates: the first stage of grief is denial. so no, i don’t believe anything that is happening.

@/puhleaseynjin: idk what to feel rn but great to know that jin knows about her marriage after all

Replying to @/puhleaseynjin

- @/livelaughyn: yeah it means they really do trust each other 🙁

And Saturday came. Since you were all over the news the whole week, your name was mentioned during the cold open. Hearing the people’s excitement as you prepare backstage made you breathe a little better. The intro began and the band began playing.

“Thirty seconds left, hon.” one of the staff members, who waits with you behind the door, whispered. “Good luck.”

You smiled at her, “Thank you. Donna.”

And as soon as you send that, you heard the announcer saying:

“Ladies and gentlemen, tonight’s host, YN!”

That’s your cue. Someone opened the door for you, you walked out and everyone sees you in a black blazer mini dress and strappy pumps. Standing in the middle of the stage, you cannot really see the audience properly because of the light pointed at you. Still, you put on a smile and tried to shake off the twisting feeling in your stomach. You jived to the melody and paused when it stopped. The audience was clapping the whole time.

“Thank you! Thank you very much. I am so happy to be finally here on the SNL stage for the very first time!” you began and they cheered once again. “And it’s great to be here, in front of everyone again, after ghosting y’all for almost two years!” waves of laughter erupt. “ Now, some of you may be heard of me from my first movie when I was 9, Little Miss Sunshine–” people cheered.  “Or my most recent film, From The Other Side. Or maybe you just heard a piece of certain news about me…” you winked.

“So in case you’re living under a rock, three days ago, I surprised everyone by announcing that I got married–” the audience erupted with claps and cheers. “–last 2021 to an actual person that nobody knows about.” you rolled your eyes, making everyone laugh.

“And every cast member here has been asking me this past few days: how did you got married? Where did you get married? Who’s the lucky guy? And you know what, let me just go give him a call–”

The audience screamed in excitement. You tapped on your dress’s pockets, searching for your phone. SNL cast member Kenan Thompson got on stage, handing you your phone.

“Hey, YN. You left your phone in the makeup chair.”

“Oh, thanks, Kenan.”

“And since I was the one who found it… can you please tell me who is your husband?” he said it in an excited kid way that made everyone cackle.

You tsked before shaking your head, “Oh, Keenan–”

A series of knocks were heard. A familiar tune from your past suspense movie played in the background. The audience laughed as you and Keenan looked at each other with wide eyes. You slipped your phone into your pocket and began acting alert like a spy.

“Does someone really knocks on that door?” you asked in the serious tone of your old character.

He shrugged his shoulders, “I don’t know. You were the last one who went from there.” 

The audience laughed and another knock was heard.

“Lemme go check on that.” Kenan was about to walk to the door but you stopped him.

“What if it’s The Creator?” you asked, referencing the antagonist.

“Who the hell is that? The only creator here is Lorne Michaels.” Kenan quipped, receiving laughs from everyone, before walking to the door.

You waited on the stage and the camera focused on Kenan, who peeked through the door instead of opening it directly. He was teasing. Then, he looked back to you, to the camera, and back to whoever was on the other side of the door. He was grinning. Everyone was wondering what was going on. It was just pure silence. And as he walked down the small set of steps, he spoke:

“Oh, YN! Someone is looking for you!”

You raised an eyebrow, “Who is it–”

Then suddenly the door just opens, showing a man in a dark casual suit and a bouquet of white tulips in his hands. He uttered,

“Hi, I’m actually looking for my wife–” 

Jin was cut off by screams from the audience. He bit his inner cheek to stop himself from smiling. But everyone can notice the corner of his lips forming into a smile. In live shows like this, the actor would usually wait for the intense audience response to die down for a few seconds. But the reactions are not getting smaller, so Jin resumed.

 

“She told me she’s going here tonight.”

“Oh, I’m here! I’m here! I’m the wife!”

You raised your hand with a proud grin on your face and Jin had to walk down with a bouquet in his hand. The audience laughed as the band plays a wedding march. Your husband laughs too. When you two stood next to each other in the middle of the stage, Keenan introduced you two:

“Everyone, please welcome, for the first time ever as a married couple, YN and Jin!”

The audience clapped, cheered, and somebody even whistled. He softly placed his hand on the small of your back before you turned to him. Your hand caresses his cheek as you two lean closer to each other. For the first time ever, you and Jin shared a kiss in front of the public. Everyone cheered louder. Pulling away, you two smiled slowly as you gazed into each other’s eyes. You noticed the slight tint of red growing on his cheeks and ears. It reminded you of so many moments in your relationship. It was like you got lost in the moment for a second before you turn to the camera.

“We got a great show tonight! Stick around. NIKI is here! We’ll be right back!”

The camera pans away as you wrapped your arms around Jin’s neck, pulling him in for a kiss again, while he holds your waist. 

You did a total of eight skits, two of which were pretaped. Your husband made another appearance during the show. He played a character with Michael Che, Colin Jost, and Mikey Day during the Weekend Update segment, playing as paparazzi who never did their job right. Jin had a line that was so ironic, it made the audience laugh and react from their seats.

“Yeah, last week, I heard that very beautiful actress got married…”

Michael asked, in character, amidst the giggles, “Who? What’s her name?”

“I think he’s talking about Scarlett Johansson.” Mikey chimed in, making Colin Jost smile, who replies, “No, I don’t think he’s not.”

“Oh, yeah. I forgot she already married that comedy guy three years ago.” Mikey replied, making Jost shake his head as he blush.

Jin finally answered, “It’s YN! You know, the one who posts cat pics all over the internet, won the BAFTA Best Actress this year, has been doing movies since she was nine, wrote songs with–”

“Okay, okay, Frank. I think everyone already knows who YN is.” Mikey cuts him off, making everyone laugh. “Why are you bringing her up by the way? Do you got any snaps from her wedding?”

“Ah, yes. I do!” Jin replied almost immediately as he acts clicking on his camera. The audience squealed, elated to catch a glimpse of whatever he was going to share. The TV screens in the studio glitched, causing confusion to the viewers. “Oh, I think my camera’s broken.”

“Let me see.” Mikey, in character, acted desperate as he reached for the camera. He checked and clicked on it before turning to Jin, “The memory card is not here, man!”

The bit ended with them arguing. NIKI performed two songs for the night. For the closing of the show, you had a graphic shirt on with pants. 

“Thank you so much to NIKI!” you began, turning to the singer beside you. You clapped along with the audience.  “To Lorne, to the amazing cast and studio crew…. And to my lovely husband,” everyone, including the cast members, cooed. You looked back at him who was standing in line with the cast members. He smiled as he saw your eyes sparkling with joy. You looked back to the front.

“Thank you so much, everyone!”

After the show, you and Jin were photographed together, walking hand in hand, as you enter the afterparty venue. As usual, you were wearing something Versace. You stun everyone with a light-reflecting metallic sparkly mini dress. It literally reflects with the flashes of the cameras pointed at you and your husband. You matched it with silver strappy heels and a small metallic Prada tote bag.

“Congrats, YN!”

You stopped in your tracks and turned your head when you heard that voice. Turning around, you spotted Greg in line with other paparazzi.

“Thanks, Greg!” you winked and Jin also waves at him.

You also posted a photo a day after.

YN and JIN are married *Apparently For Almost Two Years Now*

It’s been a busy week for the whole YNJIN fandom this week! 

Just last week’s Saturday, it was announced that YN will be hosting the second show for SNL’s season 49. More than a year after her last public appearance and hiatus.  It was later followed by the actress-songwriter appearance on The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon, in which she talked about her BAFTA win and cleverly announced her marriage. Although she didn’t disclose who’s the lucky guy, happiness was evident on her face as she replied to Jimmy’s questions. The fans were taken in surprise by the news, showering her with lovely congratulatory messages.

And just tonight, during her monologue as the show’s host, YN finally revealed who it was. Surprise, surprise! Joining her on the SNL stage is her longtime rumored lover, JIN. The ‘Still Alive’ actor showed up on stage unexpectedly, causing a loud reaction from the live viewers. SNL cast member Kenan Thompson, who was also in the bit for YN’s monologue, officially introduced the two as husband and wife. The couple shared a liplock to seal the news.

According to the shared statement of the A-lister couple’s publicists, YN and JIN were wed in an intimate ceremony two years ago, last November 2021, in their shared residence in Massachusetts. 

It was unclear where or when YN and JIN got engaged or began dating. But all we know was the two initially met for the production of their first movie, Cornelia Street, back in 2016. It was a hit, mainly due to the lead actors’ powerful chemistry, and birthed many supporters for the duo. But the rumors about their relationship began in 2018 when the two were seen hanging out often. 

The two never confirmed anything and trolled everyone about it. Even reaching the point where they became Instagram official. YNJIN even made a joke about buzzes about them breaking up when they posted a clip about it before. The two got crazier rumors over the years: living together, cheating (and breaking up again), and the actress writing love songs based on her relationship with JIN.

YN, 28, has previously dated other known names in the industry such as Jordan Fisher, Kim Taehyung, and Niall Horan. Meanwhile, JIN, 31,  was more private with his past relationships. But he was formerly linked to model Lee Sung Kyung and briefly to Selena Gomez. The wedded A-listers have worked together in a total of three films: Cornelia Street, Maybe Yes Maybe No, and Lonely People.

We are probably late but… Best wishes to Hollywood’s favorite couple!

It was a big event in both social media and celebrity newsrooms. People shared their reactions online and even talked about you two in their real-life conversations. A lot of people made memes about the whole thing. The reveal of your husband was called iconic in one of the articles written. The number of edits, pictures, and just any type of content flooding all commonly used social media sites is crazy.

@/YNJINUpdates: YNJIN officially confirms marriage during SNL appearance 💚

@/thisislove: IM CRYING THEY LOOK SO GOOD TOGETHER

@/IMMANEEDSP4CE: ynjin hard launching their relationship on snl is not in my 2023 bingo card

@/KellyDelaCruz: I just lost fifty dollars to my sister because of this whole thing!

@/bellisimayn: the whole fandom right now:

@/tanginuhynjin4ever: we never got any dating confirmation but it’s all worth it!! 💗💗

Replying to @/tanginuhynjin4ever

- @/0283ynjinfan: TOTALLY WORTH IT

Two days, after you publicized your marriage, it was Jin’s birthday. As to keep up with the tradition, you posted a simple greeting on Instagram. You literally just greeted them but you added some photos.

The first pic was taken during your trip together months before the reveal.

The second image is your hand, showing off the engagement ring, while Jin can be seen in the background grinning.

Then, on the third slide, a polaroid picture of you and Jin. It was taken through a selfie. You were grinning as Jin plants a smooch on your cheek. Unbeknownst to everyone, it was taken during your first wedding back in November 2021, in your then-newly bought home in Massachusetts.

And for the fourth one, Jin was seen carrying two babies, both heads turned away from the camera, on each arm. He was sat on a familiar couch with Francheskat resting beside him.

In the last slide, a screenshot of your conversation from a year ago. You did not put any context so the fans are left to think about it.

author's note | that's it, folks! that's the end. oh my god, I didn't expect the love this series got. writing this series always brought me joy and it honestly brought me back here in tumblr. thank you so much for all the love you sent out for the a-listers. i truly appreciate everything. as always, my asks are open for questions about the whole series. also, if you have questions for the a-listers, feel free to send 'em. I'll be responding in a few days. also, just want to let y'all know, i'm planning for a spinoff. thank you so much, loves. 💕✨

taglist rules

THE A-LISTERS TAGLIST

@jub-jub @yoontaethings @kissme-ornot @sleepy-daydreams @veronawrites @cuteipat @ratherbefangirling @babystarcandy-gcf @akirawhore @alpacaparkaseok @rjsmochii @lovesickbangtan @rapmonie2047 @btsiguess-kpop @angelarin @walkinganxiety0 @bloopkook @yoooonie @amara-mars @firesighgirl @zwiehe @hiii-priestess @lojocas @juju-227592 @singukieee @eshtravagent @canarystwin @petalsofink

PERMANENT TAGLIST

@dunixxd​ @cixrosie​ @jksjx​ @embrace-themagic​ @buttvi​ @starbtslove​ @missseoulite @vanntaesworld @kenqki @pixybear @miyukihoshi @stopeatread @seolaquotes @greyrain23 @chimchimmarie

[tommydarlings]

Tous les mêmes | t.w

pairing: toto wolff x reader

warnings: none

w/c: 0.9k

summary: You absolutely hated it when men raised their voice at you, what was pretty much your fathers fault… you really though that it would be different with toto but let’s be honest, what did you expect when you started dating a man that could be your father.

song suggestion: tous les mêmes by stromae

my masterlist <3 // my ko-fi to support me! <3 // my PayPal to support me! <3 // my Patreon to become a member! <3

You hated it when people yelled at you. You despised it. Especially when men were the ones that were doing it, thinking they can yell at you wherever and whenever they want because you are such a tiny and almost breakable little women that never opens her mouth.

You especially hated it because it always reminds you of how your father yelled at you back then.

His voice was always loud and deep, sometimes you still hear it ringing in your ears and just hope that it’s gonna go away as quick as it came. He never touched you or harmed you in any physical kind of way but definitely mental.

As soon as you left your father, you thought that it would stop. That you would never need to hear and face a man yelling at you ever again but your love life had different plans.

No man ever hit you or generally raised his hand, but definitely his voice. You were yelled at, cursed at, and other not really enjoyable things in the past from your ex-boyfriends and you thought that it would be different with him but let’s be honest… stromae was right with his song 'tous le memes', they are really all the same.

And also… what did you expect when you started dating a 51 year old man that could actually be your father. Of course it reminds you of him then but you were always a bit to oblivious and dumb when it came to loving someone, especially older man.

You bit your lip while tears blurred your vision as you looked up at your way taller boyfriend, hands grabbing your shirt in a rather tight grip. You were really angry and you couldn’t be angry at someone, especially the man that you love, without being on the edge of crying.

“Y/n! For the last time, I know Sandra for years, okay?! Longer than you!” Toto yelled at you from across the kitchen. You only shook your head, bottom lip already trembling.

Toto obviously noticed that, “Do not cry right now little one, you have no right to cry now.” He quickly told you with a tiny grin on his lips.

He was even smiling.

You gulped, “A-Are you serious Toto? It doesn’t matter!” You usually never raised your voice but you felt like you couldn’t hold it back anymore. “You were talking to her way more than to me!”

Your angry boyfriend sighed loudly, “What should I talk about with my own girlfriend that I’m seeing everyday, y/n!” He shouted at you from across the room.

You felt the first couple of tears sliding down your cheeks, eyes still focused on how his jaw was clenching and how his furious eyes were starring at your trembling figure.

Did you already mention that you hated men yelling at you? Probably.

“I-I don’t know-”

“Look!, you don’t even fucking know yourself y/n!” He said in a really uncomfortably loud tone. Finger angrily pointing at you.

You choked back a sob, bottom lip now trembling even more whilst your fingers were still clenching the bottom of your oversized T-shirt that was actually his bit you kind of wished it wouldn’t be his right now.

You were looking like a child getting yelled at for eating the candy that you weren’t supposed to eat because you’ve already had enough and Toto knew that.

“Like c'mon little one, don’t argue with me about utter bullshit, you know that I hate that.” He argued, voice now a bit quieter but still filled with anger and probably also slight hatred. You nodded, not knowing what else your supposed to do,

“I'm s-sorry.” You sniffled, tears not really stopping as your head hang low.

You raised your hand and wiped some of the tears away as new ones were already making their way down your cheeks again but then you felt two big hands grappling your wrist and pulling your hands off of your face.

You raised your head again and looked up at your still kind of angry looking boyfriend but now with a tiny not so mean grin on his face. The older man lowered your arms and grabbed your cheeks with his big hands, thumbs now wiping your tears away.

He sighed, “It’s okay y/n baby, it’s okay.” Toto muttered quietly while he was rubbing your back. You drew your gaze up to the way taller man infront of you and went on your tippy toes, leaning forward. He chuckled,

“Oh come here.”

He said to you before his hands got a hold of your hips and picked you up, carrying you now and leaning forward to capture your lips in a lovely kiss, thumbs stroking your skin.

You smiled into the kiss before you wrapped your arms around his neck. Toto also smiled, fingers squeezing your flesh. You squealed and briefly broke the kiss before you went in for another one as you felt him making his way up to the stairs.

“I am so sorry that I yelled at you baby, I know you hate that.” He apologised while he opened the door to the bedroom.

You retreated your lips from his and looked at him, “it’s okay-”

“No it’s not little one and you know it.”

You didn’t say anything, instead, you leaned forward and kissed him again, hands now intertwining themselves into the roots of his soft short hair.

“I love you so much.” Toto mumbled quietly before you two went on kissing. “I love you too.” You quickly told him as your kissing got a bit rougher and faster, both of you losing themselves in each other.

[seperis]

dear tumblr

This is hard for me to say.

I think I--and all of us--need to apologize to you, tumblr.  Yes, this is a hellsite, every possible design choice made is counter-intuitive to the aesthetics and logical processes of the brain of pretty much any humans, not just those who you cloned to get their skin that I assume you are wearing when you came to our planet for whatever shit aliens do and wanted to blend.

You are a dumpster fire, yes, but over the years, we were warmed by that fire or Stockholmed into thinking we were which is basically the same thing. We could leave--I mean, logically, I know that’s possible--but we don’t.  Yeah, I got nothing, I can see the doors but I can’t seem to get to them.

Anyway, we were hostile. We did not defend you when other social media sites made fun of you.  Which may explain those design choices, now that I think about it.  Yes, you did set an ai bot to catch porn and thought we got off to sexy geometic shapes like triangles, but looking back, that was kind of charming and the memes were amazing. You’re still here--I genuinely do not know how you managed--and we still come here and are reassured to see you are still very weird but now sometimes there are crabs and bells. I don’t think you actively hate your users, either, you just don’t understand people or sentient beings, so maybe you’re just bad at showing affection and are super passive-aggressive. 

Look, I”m saying you may be a hellsite but you are our hellsite and I don’t think we tell you that enough.

And right now, there is a fair to good chance that in the vast landscape of the giants of social media, you will be the last one standing and seriously, what the fuck?  This was not on my bingo card in this or any alternative universe. You did it by dint of not actively hating your users and publicly picking fights with them then taunting them when they rebelled, engaging in random acts of self-mutilation of your infrastructure for lols or being elon musk. I mean, that’s a pretty fucking low bar, come think, and honestly, it shouldn’t be that hard to clear it, but you’re pretty much the only one who did.

I say this with total sincerity and a sense that reality is crumbling around me: congratulations. I think you are going to win the social media wars.  I mean, yeah, you could disappear like tomorrow--I actually kind of expect that daily--but you will be the only one we won’t actively hate so yeah, you still win.  I am going to drink--quite a bit maybe forever--in your honor.

Hugs and kisses,

seperis

[mikuni14]

Jack & Joker - Ep 10

What an emotional and eventful episode✨

Of course I can't help but start with their 🔥 scene. Everything was very beautifully shot, visually and colorfully a bit like old Hong Kong movies, full of half-tones, very lovely. Yin and War delivered, but no surpise here, it's them. I really liked how they were together in this scene, a very pleasant reference to MaxTul, those muscles, sounds, smacking on naked body, grabbing it, passion and desire at the highest levels, but lined with playfulness, carefreeness, love 😏 In both couples we can see what I always appreciate very much, that is, their naturalness and that as a viewer I have no doubts that these characters played by these actors are super horny for their lovers 😤 Special mention of the Ikea clothes rack, because I recently assembled exactly that type, so I kind of relate, cue Di Caprio pointing at tv meme lol. (hot muscle daddies who push themselves into it for my entertainment were not included in my clothes rack set, I think I'll file a complaint).

The scene with Joke's father: siiiiiiiiigh but yeah, sadly I expected this, I also expected to hear: "we actually love you and miss you / but why didn't you visit us, we were waiting for you god you screwed up again". I don't know how you can go from "he's not my son" and "a thief is always a thief" to "come home for dinner", but what do I know, right? I was prepared for this, I still hate it.

The constant references to death, the repeated words about farewell, about forgiveness, returning as a ghost 😬, don't fill me with any particular optimism. I'm 99% certain of a happy ending, but… I am starting to worry a little. There is also an option that in the finale we will have a time skip 🙄 due to Joke, Jack, or both of them being in prison.

I also watch with neverending sadness Joke's low self-esteem and how he thinks that he doesn't deserve anything good, and how easily he is able to throw away his happiness, ruin his future.

As a big fan of communication between characters, between lovers, I have a "I told you so" moment that doesn't give me any satisfaction tho, it's just too sad. Because technically, objectively, almost everything actually is Joke's fault (I know that Boss is first and mainly to blame) and he constantly does things behind Jack's back - with the best and purest intentions - but still. He keeps throwing himself into situations, sacrificing himself completely, just to help Jack, but in reality… well. He only gets him more into trouble every time. Joke never asks Jack if he wants his "help", he just decides for him. Besides, Jack clearly told him not to try to help him anymore. I wholeheartedly support them, but looking from the outside, this is not a healthy relationship, in which there is so little honesty, trust and communication. And in which one has clear, unaddressed tendencies towards self-destruction, not taking into account his health, life, or even the possibility of being in prison again.

Save and attempts to whitewash him "because he's stuck too" and "there's no other way for him" irritate me. Oh he's sorry? He's sad? Well, his victims don't even have that luxury, because they're dead. Save didn't even try to soften what he's doing, trying to help somehow, warn Boss's victims, he just did what he was told without hesitation and on top of that showed unnecessary overzealousness. I don't want to hear that he's "like the others" because he actively works for Boss without even trying to mitigate the evil he's doing. Sorry, but fuck this guy.

I've seen emerging controversies related to trans characters, who seem to be treated worse in J&J. Please remember that during the first ring heist, in the same ep Noo Lek was treated badly and a male model was also attacked and beaten, who was completely innocent, who earns money for a living with his face and his body, so this beating was doubly bad. And regarding Jennie's character being thrown from a height: in the same episode, a literal child was also thrown from a height (and survied because of the plot armor, let's be honest). I know it seems like trans people are treated worse, but in this show, something bad happens to someone all the time, people are hounded, beaten, tortured, attacked, poisoned, exploited, cheated, forced to sell their body parts (!) and no one is spared, including children and the elderly. I think we noticed what seems like a pattern because there are simply more of trans / non binary people than in other series, and they are just as much victims of the system.

........

So a lot happened, I'm starting to worry a little about the ending, so I'll go back to my favorite moment in this episode: Jack grabbing Joke by the chin and guiding him to a kiss and then pinning his hand 🔥

[bubblergoespop]

My Top Guy Quotes

silly pizza manヽ(*＾ω＾*)ﾉ @capitalisticveins @miya-akiko he has been delivered!!

“You’re a jerk. Well. I like jerks.”

“We can’t be getting outta bed before 10, that’d be crazy, that would violating countless labor laws.”

“Oh, you are getting close. Hi! Hi baby. I love youuu~”

“I missed you. I always miss you. Days are long when you’re not around.”

“Jealousy’s a disease, get well soon to those bitches.“

“Come on, take my hand. Well if you don’t, I mean you could get lost on the way. Anything could happen.”

“I am not a menace. I am the menace. And I am your menace. I love you, honey.”

“I don’t need all that shit. I love you just like this. Eye rolling and grumbling is a totally valid love language.”

“Dishes? Dishes? You want me to do dishes? […] Honey, I like a little degradation as much as the next guy, but can’t you just put me on a leash instead, like a normal couple?”

“Let go of me, ahhhh I’m being repressed!”

“Oh, no, no I’m kidding, come here, don’t pout. Yes you are, you are pouting. It’s cute.“

“I vacillate wildly between either looking like an Adonis sent down like a gift or a literal gremlin that couldn’t pull numbers if his life depended on it.”

“No, you smile plenty. And it’s a beautiful smile when you grace me with it. It’s special when you smile.”

“But you are a softy with me. And the other people you care about. You feel things deep. That’s not a bad thing.”

“And how exactly do you expect to keep me in this bed now that you’ve got me here, hmm? Thought about that? Ooohhh gon’ tie me down, fifty shades of honey oooo~”

“You look really cute bundled up in bed like that. Shut up, yes you do. My cute little grumpyface. Aw is my grumpyface mad at me?“

“Aw. That’s so sweet. Who are you and what have you done with my lover? [hit] Ow, okay, there you are.”

“What do you mean you’re gross? You’re not gross, you’re amazing.”

“Thank you for seeing something in me. Something that mattered. Nah, I was talking about my ass.”

“You know wordplay reminds me of? Tongue-twisters! You know what tongue-twisters remind me of? Tongue-kissing, let’s explore that topic shall we—ow ow ow”

“That’s not nothing, that’s called quality time honey.”

“I only wanna be supine if I’m being supine with you!”

“I’m a bad bitch, you can’t kill me~”

“Ew, you can’t give me a forehead kiss, that’s too sweet! Who are you? Why would you do that, being all tender and sweet, that’s gross, you’re gross. No, don’t go. I like you tender and sweet and gross.”

“You have a wonderful hand. It does exquisite work. Ooo don’t make a boy a promise, you betta use it to cover this mouth, fifty one shades of honey ooo~.”

“Making my stupid jokes isn’t as fun without you rolling your eyes and pretending to hate it.”

“Is that why you put up with my memes and shit? Cause I got a big dick and a great ass?”

“I’ll never be sorry for a chance to spend a day at your side.”

“—eh, “Buy Low”, “Start Low”, what’s the difference? You say tomato, I say I wanna put my head between your thighs, it’s semantics.”

“It’s about your thighs wrapped around my head like you’re trying to crush a watermelon. Aw, come on, I’m made of tough stuff. Or not, but hey, that’s a hell of a way to go.”

“You know what this means though, right? Oh my god, they were roommates!”

“Honeybabydarling.”

“But I’ll restrain myself. At least until I can convince you to restrain me. Preferably to our bed. Unnhh.”

“I want to make you squirm under the touch of my fingers and the heat of my mouth and the weight of my tight, straining body pressed flush against yours. And then at some point you can shampoo my hair, cause that always feels nice.”

“Okay, okay, very serious… Canasta. Nasty canasty. Ow—!”

“I’m ready for instruction, professor. Mmm. Mmhmm. I think you’ll find I’m a very hands-on learner. Unnhhh.”

“Do they have to match suite kiss me. Hmm? No, I asked do they have to match suite kiss me, like does the whole canasta kiss me have to be the same suite please kiss me. I don’t know what you mean kiss me. […] kiss me, kiss me really hard.”

“Because no one’s gonna tell me I’m too sexy to be who I am.”

“And maybe I wanna get some, I don’t know! Who said that? Wait— who said that? Wait, who was that? I mean that wasn’t me… shit.”

“That’s my brain, and the only thing that’s gonna wake it up is some kisses. Slow sexy kisses. With tongue. For. You know. Kinetic energy. Transfer. In my mouth. Our mouths.”

“Thank you, honey. I don’t know. For a lot of things. For the water. For hanging out with me. For putting up with me. For being so hot and sexy. I repeat, for putting up with me.”

“I’d lick it off the fucking floor at this point if that’s what you want— anything. That’d be pretty fucking hot actually.”

“I love you, hun.”

“Ah, mm, no. I saw the smile. Yes you did, you can’t hide it from me.”

“Anyway, I am half naked. You are very mean. That’s very hot. You and me honey ain’t nothing but mammals so, uh, whaddya say we do it like they do on discover channel, unhh? Well, you know, personally I was thinking a little less nature documentary and a little more battle bots, you know? Like, I want you to just fucking snap me like a twig!”

“Can’t steal what’s already yours. That’s why you can’t steal my heart cause it’s already yours. Do not groan at me!”

“With you, silence doesn’t feel bad. You looking at me doesn’t feel scary. It feels really good. Feeling seen by you feels good.”

[samflir]

What makes a good boot sequence?

A while ago, I had my first truly viral post on Mastodon. It was this:

You might've seen it. It got almost four hundred boosts and reached beyond Mastodon to reddit and even 4chan. I even saw an edit with a spinning frog on the left screen. I knew the post would go down well with tech.lgbt but I never expected it to blow up the way it did.

I tried my best to express succinctly exactly what it is I miss about BIOS motherboards in the age of UEFI in this picture. I think looking at a logo and spinner/loading bar is boring compared to seeing a bunch of status messages scroll up the screen indicating hardware being activated, services being started up and tasks being run. It takes the soul out of a computer when it hides its computeriness.

I think a lot of people misunderstood my post as expressing a practical preference over an aesthetic one, and there was at least a few thinking this was a Linux fanboy post, which it certainly is not. So here's the long version of a meme I made lol.

Stages

I remember using two family desktop computers before moving over a family laptop. One ran Windows XP and the other ran Windows 7. Both were of the BIOS era, which meant that when booting, they displayed some status information in white on black with a blinking cursor before loading the operating system. On the XP machine, I spent longer in this liminal space because it dual-booted. I needed to select Windows XP from a list of Linux distros when booting it.

I've always liked this. Even as a very little kid I had some sense that what I was seeing was a look back into the history of computing. It felt like a look "behind the scenes" of the main GUI-based operating system into something more primitive. This made computers even more interesting than they already were, to me.

Sequences

The way old computers booted was appealing to my love of all kinds of fixed, repeating sequences. I never skip the intros to TV shows and I get annoyed when my local cinema forgets to show the BBFC ratings card immediately before the film, even though doing so is totally pointless and it's kinda strange that they do that in the first place. Can you tell I'm autistic?

Booting the windows 7 computer would involve this sequence of distinct stages: BIOS white text -> Windows 7 logo with "starting windows" below in the wrong aspect ratio -> switch to correct resolution with loading spinner on the screen -> login screen.

Skipping any would feel wrong to me because it's missing a step in one of those fixed sequences I love so much. And every computer that doesn't start with BIOS diagnostic messages is sadly missing that step to my brain, and feels off.

Low-level magic

I am extremely curious about how things work and always have been, so little reminders when using a computer that it has all sorts of complex inner workings and background processes going on are very interesting to me, so I prefer boot sequences that expose the low-level magic going on and build up to the GUI. Starting in the GUI immediately presents it as fundamental, as if it's not just a pile of abstractions on top of one another. It feels deceptive.

There may actually be some educational and practical value in computers booting in verbose mode by default. Kids using computers for the first time get to see that there's a lot more to their computer than the parts they interact with (sparking curiosity!), and if a boot fails, technicians are better able to diagnose the problem over a phone call with a non-technical person.

Absolute boot sequence perfection

There's still one last thing missing from my family computer's boot sequence, and that's a brief flicker of garbage on screen as VRAM is cleared out. Can't have everything I guess. Slo-mo example from The 8-Bit Guy here:

[baby-alien11]

Late Prom Night (Y/N Ulrich Universe)

This is long, so grab something to eat and drink and make yourselves comfortables

taglist: @volturi-girl-imagines @dessxoxsworld @aonungsgirlfriend @ethanlandryluver @wenvierismycomfort @aliciacat20 @gabbylovesreading @nikfigueiredo

Thanks to the fact that Jack just finished filming his new movie last week he was back in town, which meant make up for the time they were separated (except for the birthday weekend and the TS concert)

The gym dates every morning were also back, so after Jack picked you from your house in his car, both of you entered the gym greeting Josh, Hayley and baby Rogue to start streaching for the workout of the day

"Y/N, thirty minutes in the treadmill", Hayley instructed next to you, "The first ten minutes at velocity three, the next ten at five, and the last ten at seven, understood?"

"Absolutely", you nodded

Placing your phone, water bottle and towel in the small table next to you, you configured the treadmill to start with your workout, at the same time that yours and Jacks workout playlist started to sound throught the speakers

While you were focused on the first part of your routine, you couldn't ignore how your phone started to sound with a lot of notifications of messagges, which you asumed they were from the groupchat with Jakob and Naiia

After finishing with the treadmill, you took a big sip of water and grabed your phone to see a lot of messages from your old high school group

'This is weird', you though while frowned, the group was dead since the graduation

Openning the group chat, you were quick to notice a lot of excited text along with gifs, stickers and memes making you smile in fun, until you saw a flyer

"You've got to be kidding me", you murmured

"Are you okay?", Jack asked aproaching you

"Remember how I didn't had a prom because of covid and ended up graduating via zoom?", you asked at which Jack nodded in response, "Well, the school is making a dance for us in two weeks"

"I would say that sounds cool, but based on what you told me about your high school experience I don't know exactly what to say"

Smiling with sweetness bacause of what he said, you were quick to tangle your fingers in his hair, which caused Jack to put his head in your shoulder

"So, what are you going to do?", Jack questioned

"I don't know, I mean I hope the two years of quarantine helped some people to be better", you rambled, "But I still friends have from there who I rarely talk lately and it will be nice to see them in person again"

"In that case, what's the veredict?"

"We are going to that dance"

"Yes!", Jack exclaimed rasing his hand for a high five which you did, "Is there a theme?"

"Hollywood Extravaganza", you responded looking at the flyer, "Babe, this is our theme"

"We are going to be the best dressed", Jack nodded

"Guys, we are happy that you're having a prom night", Josh interrupted, "But we still have to finish the training"

Laughing a little, you and Jack shared a small kiss before continuing with your routines

When Jack said to be the best dressed, you didn't expected to see two designers from the Armani team in your doorway, and even more surprised when they started to fill the dinner table with books with designs and fabric samples

"Dad, what the hell is happening?", you murmured next to him, both with cups full of coffee

"First, don't say bad words in my presence", Skeet said in the same low tone making you smile in fun, "Second, I don't know"

"Y/N", one of them called interrupting the little conversation, "We are ready to start"

Sharing a glance with your dad you aproach the table to sit in front of them, while Skeet went to his office

"We can see the confussion in your eyes, so here it goes the explanation", the other one spoke, "First, we loved to work with you and Jack for the looks for the LA premier of Avatar, and his stylist called us a few days ago about asking for some options of suits for a prom dance, and we instantly asked for you, about what you were going to wear"

"That explains why the other day Jack called me for a second asking me that", you joked making them laugh

"After he told us that you didn't even started to look for outfits, we decided to pay you a surprise visit", the first one continued, "Armani is going to dress you both, so, is there a theme?"

"Hollywood Extravaganza", you nodded

"This is perfect", one of them commented, "You are a legacy child and VFX artist in the making and Jack is a rising star"

Starting with the meeting, they show you some haute couture and ready to wear which none of them catched your attention even if they were beautiful, so the next option was to do something custom made

During the next hour, the three of you spend the time making different designs acording to the theme and looking at the fabric samples, until one of them was the chosen one

"You are going to shine with this dress", one of the designers commented making you smile, "Before we start taking your measurements, we need to disscus the shoes for the lenght of the dress, do you have any that can go with the dress, if isn't the case we can also provide them?"

"I have a pair of black Aevitas that Camila Mendes and Lili Reinhart gave me this Christmas", you answered, "The ones with the 15.5 cm heels"

"They perfect, those are kinda like universal shoes, they go with everything", the other designer said, "Can you bring them so that way we can start with the measurements?"

Nodding, you were quick to go to your room and take the shoes and return to the living room to continue with the dress making process

When the day of the dance arrived, your living room was full since early in the morning with your dads stylist who were also yours arrived to get you ready for the night, starting with some facials to get your skin ready and get your nails done during noon

At lunch time, Jakob and Naiia arrived with food for everyone before starting with the hair and make up

"Look at you, getting all glamed for your prom dance", Naiia joked sitting next to you while the team started with their work, "By the way, the dress is beautiful"

"Thank you", you smiled in response

"So, how do you feel going this late to your prom?", Jakob asked eating french fries

"It's only like year and a half later but a little nervous", you answered with sincerity, "I don't know, I haven't seen any of them in person since the pandemic started"

"And now you are returning in your way to be succesful, and with a boyfriend that we all love, and both dressed in Armani", Jakob said, "Let's hope that that girl Kira has changed in these years"

"Amen", you and Naiia exclaimed

A few minutes later, the front door was knocked which made Skeet leave his spot on the dinning room to attend, returning two minutes later with a big floral arragement

"Tornado, this is for you", Skeet announced leaving it in the center of the dinning table

"Oh my God, they are so beautiful", you exclaimed streching your hand to take the note attached to them reading the envelope, "It's from Jack"

Happy prom night gorgeous! I'm so happy that we get to do this together

I can't wait to see you in a few hours

Love, Jack

Smiling because of the sweetness of his words, you took your phone to send him a text thanking him the flowers, before taking a photo of them and uploading it to your instagram stories tagging him

"I don't know where are going to put them", Jakob commented, "This isn't the Kardashians household"

Thanks to that comment, you, Naiia, Skeet and the rest of the glam team started to laugh

"We are not the Kardashians", Naiia said still laughing

"We should have our own reality show", you joked, "Keeping up with the Ulrichs"

"Screaming with the Ulrichs sound better", Skeet pointed

Keeping with the little jokes and conversations, the hours spend quickly until the front door was knocked again, when your make up in dark blue and silver colors with your nude lipstick and hair styled like Gigi Hadid in the 2018 MET Gala were ready, and again, Skeet went to answer the door this time returning with Jack (who was completely ready) and Anna

"Hi, beautiful", Jack greeted sitting next to you taking your hand, "You look absolutely gorgeous"

"You look handsome as well", you responded smiling, "I love the flowers, they're beautiful"

"I'm glad you loved them"

"Guys, sorry for interrupting the moment", one of the stylist spoke, "But we have to get you dressed right know, but the shoes are going first"

"Okay", you nodded

With the help of the girl who did your nails, you put on the high heels adjusting the straps in your ankles in a way that they don't feel loose before walking to the makeshift dresser in the living room with Naiia and two more styilist to help with the dress and gloves

Once everything was put in place with the outfit, you along with the little crew came out of the makeshift dresser getting instant reactions for everyone

While the glam team put the silver earings and a small and simple silver chain style choker (one of Bailey's gifts for your birthday), the Armani photographers started to take photos of Jack to post later on Instagram, then it was your turn with the whole outfit, and last of both of you, and they were lucky to have two serious photos because after that, the rest were doing funny faces and silly poses

Lastly, before leaving, family photos were taken which ended up being funny because your dad and siblings were basically in pajamas

After a twenty minute car ride, your old school was in sight, also noticing some students of your generation in the entrance

"I haven't been here since march 2020", you sighed while Jack drove towards the entrance were a red carpet was placed, "It feels weird and nostalgic"

"Are you comfortable with this?", Jack asked before stepping out of the car

"Totally", you nodded, "Besides, as you said, we are the best dressed"

Kissing your gloved hand, Jack got out of the car which caused a reaction in some of the ex-students because they didn't expected to see one of the young actors of the moment in there, and they were more surprised when he opened the passenger side streching his hand to help you get out of the car and helping to fix your dress, while one valet went to park the car

Interwining hands, both of you started walking throught the carpet to the inside of the school towards the gym

"Y/N!"

You heard someone screaming your name, which caused both of you to turn in that direction

"Sarah!", you exclaimed with excitement

Happy to see one of your friends in person after months, you almost run towards her which ended up in a hug, while Jack stayed a few steps behind smiling

"I thought that you wouldn't come", Sarah said breaking the hug but still holding your hands, "That dress is amazing"

"I contemplate about coming or not, believe me", you laughed, "Your dress is also amazing, and I want to introduce you to someone"

Being his cue, Jack stepped closer taking your waist

"This is Jack, my boyfriend", you introduced proudly, "Jack, this is my high school best friend Sarah"

"Nice to meet you", Jack smiled with a hand shake

"It's nice to see my best friend happy", Sarah responded watching your face, "Let's go to the gym, almost all our group is in there"

Interwining your free arm with hers and Jack now holding your small purse, the three of you walked towards the gym now decorated as if it was from an award ceremony

"This remind me of the Critics Choice", Jack commented

"But with more space between tables", you joked remembering how small the space was

"One of you has to invite me to a future premiere or event", Sarah spoked with fun, "I want to experience that world"

"Dude, you went with me and my dad to the season one premiere of Riverdale", you pointed with fun

"Yeah, in 2017", she reminded

Laughing, the three of you continue walking throught the gym until a table with familiar faces for you and Sarah, ending in an excited reunion with hugs and meetings, before taking seats

"Dude, I'm going to be honest with you", Noah, another friend of the group spoke towards Jack, "I was scared of you in Scream"

"Thanks, I guess", Jack laughed with his arm in the back of your chair

"You went all psycho killer", Abby, one of the girls of the group said, "Y/N, you nailed your five second cameo, I actually went to see the movie multiple times just to spot you"

"Abby, I love you, you are the sweetest", you said with sincerity, "So, what is everyone doing?"

"Studying fashion design in New York", Scott said

"Training to be a cast member at Disneyland", Abby continued

"Studying law at Standford", Sarah spoke

"Gamer in twitch", Noah finished, "What about you?"

"Practicing to be a VFX make up artist", you answered proudly

"She is awesome at that", Jack exclaimed showing some of your early works making you blush, "Like, this looks so real"

Before anyone of your friends could say something, one of your former classmates stopped by the table interrupting the conversation

"Y/N, hi!", Diana greeted at what you get up from your chair to hug her since she was polite and friendly during your school years, "I'm so happy you are here"

"I'm also happy to be here, I missed you girl", you responded breaking the hug

"Me too, I'm glad that you changed your mind and actually came", Diana smiled making confussion in you and your group, "See you around"

Waiting until she was far, you turned facing your group

"First Sarah told me something similar, now Diana", you pointed taking a seat in your chair, "What the hell is happening?"

With a hand signal from Scott everyone inclined in a way to be closer and listen

"I heard from Irma, who heard it from Daniel, who heard it from Bethany, that Kira said that fame just got to your head and you felt superior to any of us", Scott explained leaving you shocked, "Kira actually tweeted it"

"Is she fucking for real?", you yelled-murmured, "I'm not the egocentric one, she is"

"She has always been ridiculous and jealous of you", Abby pointed, "Like, starting rumours about you is pathetic"

"Here is the tweet", Noah gave you his phone with the tweet on screen

Recieving the phone you read the tweet that only had two likes, but what caught your attention was the username

Leaving the phone on the table you reached your phone which was on one of Jack's jacket pockets unlocking it to enter to your saved tweets

"I thought you quit them for there", Jack frowned looking at the hate tweets from two months ago

"I forgot to do it", you responded finding the ones with the user name, "For context, two months ago I found hate tweets towards me, some of them were from the user name ReginaGeorgeHeir"

"That's Kira's username", Sarah exclaimed

"Yeah, two of them were 'she isn't that pretty' and 'she's a nepo baby, you know how they are'", you read with anger in your voice

"Fucking bitch", Noah exclaimed noticing movement at the entrance, "Speaking of the devil"

Hearing that sentence, the six of you turned towards the entrance of the gym to watch how Kira and her minion Bethany entering

"Wait, that dress looks familiar", you pointed with narrow eyes

"I think is the same one that you wore to the Los Angeles premier of Avatar", Jack said remebering were he had seen it

"More like a dupe", Abby commented

"Girl, if you want to let go your Billy Loomis side on her we won't blame you", Sarah spoke in your direction, "We will help you hide the body and be your alibis"

"And if they ask where we were, let's say we where at econ", Jack joked, "It worked for me"

After that reference joke, your whole table started to laugh incontrolable gaining the attention of people next to you, including from the mean duo

"I give you an advice", Scott talked after the laughs calmed, "First, what are you wearing?"

"Custom Armani", you answered

"Girl, you already won the one sided battle", Scott continued, "I mean, your dad is an icon, you are starting to gain more fame of your own, you are wearing Armani to your prom, you and Jack are the IT young couple of the moment, Kira is the girl who peaked at high school and stayed mean because is everything she has"

"Scott, is right", Sarah nodded, "So let's forget about her and have some fucking fun!"

Agreeing with her, the six of you continued to talk and update about everything, taking pictures, even the boys imitated Jacks "chad face" for some pictures, doing tik toks and sharing the snacks the school provided

When people started to fill the asignated dance floor, your group did the same founding a spot for the six of you

During the next hour and a half, the time was spent dancing the popular songs of the moment that the DJ played and having fun with each other, until a slow song "Love On The Brain" by Rihanna started to sound causing the couples in there to start dancing slowly

"Are you having fun?", Jack asked with his arms circling your waist

"Lots", you smiled with your arms around his neck, "I'm glad that we came"

"Me too", Jack smiled in returned, "And your friends are really cool"

"I think they like you more than they like me", you joked making him laugh

"I actually think that they are testing me to see if I'm good for you"

"You are perfect for me"

Following that small conversation, both of you shared a small kiss that was followed with smaller ones accompanied with giggles from both of you

A few more slow songs followed after the music was stopped causing everyone to look at the stage were Kira was taking a microphone and Bethany was standing in the corner behind her

"Don't tell me she's going to do a speech", Noah groaned

"Hi everyone!", Kira exclaimed

Hearing her voice made your group (and some other people in there) groan in silence

"It's so nice to see everyone here in person", Kira continued with a fake smile, "Like we all look so expensive with our dresses and suits, so as former student president I'm honnored to give a little speech, first of all, I'm so happy to see that every one of you is being succesful, some in college, some working, some having personal bussiness, others taking advantage of parents fame"

"Someone shut her up", you murmured making your group to hold back the laughs

Unfortunately, she heard that thanks to the silence in the room noticing your group a few meters from the stage

"Y/N Ulrich!", Kira exclaimed which made all the heads to turn in your direction including a light from the stage focusing in the six of you almost blinding your group, "So happy to see that your fame didn't stop you from being here with your friends and your famous boyfriend"

"Yeah, I'm not happy to see you ReginaGeorgeHeir", at the moment you said that phrase her face fell, "I know you were one of the people who send hate tweets towards me two months ago"

"I don't know what your talking about", Kira laughed nervously

"Wasn't you the one who tweeted 'she isn't that pretty'?", Abby exclaimed reading her phone

"Or 'she's a nepo baby, we know how they are'?", Scott continued

"It was a little joke", she tried to minimized the situation but you already were walking to the stage with Jack behind you

"It's not funny to bully someone, online or in person", you replied starting to climb the stairs with the help of Jacks hand on your waist and holding one of your hands, "Thanks babe"

"Anytime, gorgeous", Jack nodded staying in the gym floor

"Okey, I tweeted that", Kira admited rolling her eyes, "But everyone was doing it, I just jumped in"

"It's wrong to do that", you claimed, "You bullied me for years in person until you knew who my dad was, and it was because you saw him on Riverdale, and tried to be my friend after years of torture, that's hypocrite, and you and Bethany also torture a lot of us during school years, and know you claim to be happy to see us?"

"You need to chill", Kira replied not knowing what to say, "And if I were you, I would use my dad connections to be succesful as an actress, not singer because your voice is horrible"

"There is the bitch, and your voice is also horrible, well, all your personality is horrible", you spoked causing all the ex-students to cheer, "Fuck, it feels good to finally say this!"

"You know all this that you said people are going to twisted make you seem like the bully, right?", Kira tried to intimidate

"Actually not, I'm live on instagram!", one of your former classmates yelled with his phone up, "1,504 people are seeing this"

"See, I'm not the only one in here that you bullied", you shrugged

"So what, you are going all ghostface on me?", Kira joked

"I mean, people callme the 'Ghostface Princess', my dad was a ghostface, my uncle Matthew was a ghostface, my boyfriend was a ghostface, it wouldn't be weird", you threatened now close to her face, "Boo"

Even if that was a whispered word, she still jumped in fear a little causing everyone to laugh at her

Smiling because she now felt how it was, you started to walk to the stairs taking the hand that Jack was holding to help you

"Oh", you exclaimed turning to look at her, "Nice dupe dress"

"It's original, idiot", Kira argued trying to gain the situation

"It isn't, I know it because I wear the same dress in december, to the Los Angeles premier of Avatar", you smiled, "The original has higher neckline"

"I had it to do some changes"

"It's actually a 2009 Giorgio Armani, basically an archive piece, those are only borrowed, which means no drastical changes can be done"

Smiling and feeling powerful, you and Jack walked with your hands interwined followed by your friends who soon joined you while the rest of ex-students laughed at Kira and Bethany

jackchampion, naiia, madelyncline, and 97, 216 more

yn.ulrich succesful prom night

tagged jackchampion, sarah_woods, abbycutie, not.scott.disick, noahtwitch

jackchampion I said it before, but I'm glad we get to do this together

› yn.ulrich I love you

› jackchampion I love you more

not.scott.disick thank you mom and dad for taking us for a snack after prom

› jackchampion anytime my child

madelame shine my baby, you deserve it

› yn.ulrich thank you favourite red